Some people feel that playing computer games has a negative impact on children’s health and social skills. Others say that it can have a positive impact on their lives. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.
Playing
video
game
become Fix the agreement mistake
games
trend
among teenagers as they feel Add an article
a trend
relax
during that Wrong verb form
relaxed
time
whereas
, some say it has demerits as they faced
health Wrong verb form
face
problem
like obesity. Fix the agreement mistake
problems
According
my viewpoint, Change preposition
In
the
both Remove the article
apply
point
have their own Fix the agreement mistake
points
important
which I will explain in upcoming paragraphs.
To argue with Replace the word
importance
first
Correct article usage
the first
prospective
that playing computer Correct your spelling
perspective
games
are
not Correct subject-verb agreement
is
a
good Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
children
as they Change preposition
for children
Add a missing verb
have healths
healths
issues Fix the agreement mistake
health
such
as when children play Correct quantifier usage
apply
video
games
for long
Change the article
a long
time
then
their eyes become weaker because the e-devices screen are harmful for
Change the preposition
to
student
eyes. Meanwhile, they become unhealthy as they reduce or avoid Fix the agreement mistake
students
to go
outside with their friends and family to play outdoor sports. As Change the verb form
going
the
Correct article usage
a
result
these kids become Add a comma
result,
obesity
and Replace the word
obese
faced
Wrong verb form
face
number
of other Correct article usage
a number
problem
. Fix the agreement mistake
problems
For example
, in COVID 19
, the majority of Add a hyphen
COVID-19
student
kii
their Correct your spelling
spend
time
while
playing Correct word choice
apply
games
, hence
they left
behind in their Add a missing verb
are left
edcation
and Correct your spelling
education
faced
health Wrong verb form
face
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
also
due to
spend
most of Wrong verb form
spending
the
Change the word
their
time
on computer
screen.
On the other Add an article
a computer
the computer
handside
, it is somehow good Correct your spelling
hand side
such
as Correct your spelling
there
their
are various Correct your spelling
there
Fix the agreement mistake
games
game
which Fix the agreement mistake
games
are
Change the verb form
is
Fix the agreement mistake
games
game
Fix the agreement mistake
games
Change preposition
apply
on
education which help to enhance their cognitive skills and Change preposition
apply
makes
the study Correct subject-verb agreement
make
esay
to remember like Correct your spelling
easy
essay
Wrong verb form
arranging
arrange
the words in which Wrong verb form
arranging
Fix the agreement mistake
students
student
learn the meaning and spelling of the words. Fix the agreement mistake
students
In other words
, it is the
Correct article usage
a
types
of entertainment Fix the agreement mistake
type
nonetheless
, student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
indirect
learn the maximum things for it. Change the word
indirectly
Besides
this
, the crime rate is also
increase in
outside Wrong verb form
increasing
that
is why to Correct pronoun usage
which
safe
their children is best to allow them to play Replace the word
save
video
game
in which they can interact with other people like Fix the agreement mistake
games
freefire
, Correct your spelling
free fire
free-fire
player
can communicate with other Fix the agreement mistake
Players
player
and explore the Fix the agreement mistake
players
differents
about the world. even not go outside .
In conclusion, Correct your spelling
different
although
playing video
games
is not for their health and career nevertheless
, I still believe that it's has
some positive effects Change the verb form
it has
also
as student
stay front
of their Change preposition
in front
parents
eyes.Change to a genitive case
parent's
parents'
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introduction conclusion present
Ensure that your introduction clearly presents the topic and outlines the views you will discuss. Additionally, end with a clear conclusion that summarises your main points and restates your opinion.
logical structure
Use clear paragraphing with topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to present main ideas. Follow each topic sentence with supporting sentences that develop the idea further.
supported main points
Make sure to expand on your main points by using examples, explanations, or data. Try to use real-world examples that are relevant and strengthen your argument.
complete response
Your response needs to fully address all parts of the task. Ensure that you discuss both views and your opinion in a balanced way, with a similar amount of detail for each.
clear comprehensive ideas
Work on presenting your ideas clearly and comprehensively. Avoid vague statements and aim for clarity in your writing to ensure that the reader easily understands your arguments.
relevant specific examples
To improve your score, include relevant and specific examples that directly support the points you are making. Your examples should be detailed enough to add value to your argument.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.