IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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There is an ongoing debate on whether university
students
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 should or should not be focusing their
studies
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 on the
courses
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 that adhere to their qualifications. Some argue that undergraduate should be focusing their
studies
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for
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on
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 their qualifications
while
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 others believe that
students
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 can learn additional
couses
Correct your spelling
courses
causes
besides
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 their main subjects. In
this
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 essay, I believe that there are valid points from both sides of the debate that
needs
Correct subject-verb agreement
need
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 to
take
Wrong verb form
be taken
show examples
 into consideration. Some undergraduates believe that focusing
for
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on
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 their qualifications
enable
Correct subject-verb agreement
enables
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 them to specialize in a particular field.
This
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 is essential for their career success because specializing
to
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in
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 one particular degree will increase their chances
to get
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of getting
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an
Correct article usage
apply
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employment.
For example
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, law
students
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 that specialize their
studies
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 in business law are more likely to get recruited as corporate
lawyer
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lawyers
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 rather than
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
law
students
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 that has no particular concentration.
Therefore
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, maintaining
particular
Correct article usage
a particular
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 specialization can guarantee a special place for
students
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' future
career
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careers
show examples
. Others believe that learning about other subjects can broaden
students
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' knowledge and perspectives.
This
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 will pave
a
Correct article usage
the
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 way for a more interdisciplinary approach that
further
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 helps their
studies
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.
For example
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, a student of geography will benefit
more
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from more
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 insights and knowledge regarding the societal aspects of their study if they take additional
courses
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 in anthropology.
Therefore
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,
students
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that
Correct pronoun usage
who
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 take additional
courses
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 can foster their path of
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studies
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study
show examples
 by
employing
Verb problem
taking
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 different
perspective
Fix the agreement mistake
perspectives
show examples
 into consideration. In conclusion, I believe there are some merits to both sides of
this
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 debate.
However
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, I leaned
on
Change preposition
toward
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 the view
that
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of
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 finding
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 right balance between exploring other
courses
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 and specializing in a certain field. By doing
this
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, I believe that
students
Use synonyms
 will reap additional interdisciplinary insights
while
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 at the same time maintaining their future prospects in certain fields.

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task achievement
Ensure that the essay provides a balanced view of both positions before stating a personal opinion, which must be clearly justified.
coherence cohesion
Organize ideas logically, making sure each paragraph flows smoothly into the next with appropriate use of linking words.
task achievement
Support each main point with specific, relevant examples. While general examples are provided, more detailed instances can enhance the argument's effectiveness.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repetitive sentence structures to create a more engaging and complex language profile.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Broaden
  • Perspectives
  • Specialize
  • Critical thinking
  • Problem-solving skills
  • Career success
  • Interdisciplinary connections
  • Structured path
  • Clear goals
  • Creativity
  • Innovation
  • Academic credibility
  • Recognition
  • Balance
  • Exploring
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