You have a full-time job and you are also doing a part-time evening course. You now find that you cannot continue the course. Write a letter to your teachers. In your letter describe the situation explain why you cannot continue at this time say what action you would like to take You do NOT need to write any addresses.

#job #course #teachers #situation #time #action #addresses

Dear Ms. Andersen, I am writing

this

letter to inform you that at

this

moment I have a really hard situation related to my free time which I usually spend

Change preposition

apply

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studying for your course. It seems like I will not have an opportunity to continue improving my knowledge in the field of my current course at

this

time in the evening. I regret to inform you my working schedule was modified by my manager at my work

due to

that some of my colleagues were fired.

Moreover

, the company decided to make significant changes in employees' timetable relatively with performance at work so we are going to work in the evening every weekday.

However

, I would like to carry on studying your course because it is closely linked to my vested interest. If we have an opportunity to make classes in the morning, I would like to take classes at

this

time.

Furthermore

, It will be a remarkable decision to continue the process of studying. I look forward to hearing from you. Yours faithfully, Ignat Bern

Submitted by yauhen.ilyushenka on Sat Jan 27 2024

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coherence cohesion

The letter successfully communicates the intended message; however, the logical structure could be improved by clearly organizing the content into paragraphs, each addressing a specific point of the task.

task achievement

Task achievement could be enhanced by providing more detailed explanations of each point and a clearer request regarding the desired action. Transition phrases should be used to improve flow and clarity.

coherence cohesion

Introduce each main idea with a clear topic sentence and provide supporting details within the same paragraph to maintain single ideas per paragraph.

task achievement

Ensure that the tone is consistently formal and polite as befits the context of a letter to an educator. Avoid overly casual phrases and maintain professional language throughout.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

7 paragraphs

177 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people say that doing multiple tasks at the same time can be beneficial. However, others are against this view. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.

Some people think that essence of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to co-operate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+