Some people say that parents should place restrictions on the hours of their children spend watching TV and playing computer games, and encourage them to spend this time reading books instead. Do you agree or disagree?

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Nowadays technological

advancments

Correct your spelling

advancements

have

mad

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made

show examples

lifestyles different. It is believed by some that there should be more strict rules for

children

Use synonyms

againts

Correct your spelling

against

the

time

Use synonyms

they spend watching TV, and kids must be encouraged to read

books

Use synonyms

instead

Linking Words

. The following paragraphs will discuss why I agree with

this

Linking Words

assertion.

To begin

Linking Words

with, TVs and computer

games

Use synonyms

have numerous harmful effects. It has been considered that spending several times a day watching screens, the

eye sight

Correct your spelling

eyesight

show examples

children

Use synonyms

will get compromised.

Due to

Linking Words

screen light, their eyes will get

cosidrebly

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considerably

damage which can lead to insufficient development. In fact, the more quality

time

Use synonyms

is spent

infront

Correct your spelling

in front

of a screen, the more risk of physical challenges individuals will suffer.

Moreover

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

matter has been proven to

have

Add the particle

have to

show examples

sever

Correct your spelling

severe

show examples

catestrophic

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catastrophic

effect

Fix the agreement mistake

effects

show examples

on human cognitive

ablities

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abilities

. Since

childrens

Change to a genitive case

children's

show examples

mental capacity

are

Change the verb form

show examples

developing, spending much of their

time

Use synonyms

on the computer can end up in

insuficient

Correct your spelling

insufficient

cognitive ability.

For example

Linking Words

, a child who plays video

games

Use synonyms

all day long,

wont

Add an apostrophe

won't

show examples

get the chance to have a face-to-face social

intraction

Correct your spelling

interaction

This

Linking Words

will result in less mental improvement and communication skills which can cause problems in their future livelihood.

Therefore

Linking Words

, because of the drawbacks of TVs and computers, parents must set some

bounderies

Correct your spelling

boundaries

for using

Correct pronoun usage

them

show examples

Secondly

Linking Words

, reading

books

Use synonyms

can boost

individuals

Fix the agreement mistake

individual

show examples

enhancment

Correct your spelling

enhancement

. Reading

books

Use synonyms

instead

Linking Words

of playing computer

games

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can contribute

children

Use synonyms

Verb problem

becoming

show examples

significantly literate and more mature.

This

Linking Words

means that these

children

Use synonyms

will develop thinking rationally remarkably faster and facil which will lead to a mature adulthood. By

this

Linking Words

ability, individuals will become

considrably

Correct your spelling

considerably

productive in their

adulessence

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adolescence

compared to ones that consumed their

time

Use synonyms

palying

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playing

games

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or watching TV.

Thus

Linking Words

, reading

books

Use synonyms

can pave the way for

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

well-educated residents with a qualified sense. In conclusion, my point of view is, not only for the several harmful

affects

Replace the word

effects

show examples

of the digital world, but

also

Linking Words

for the beneficial impacts of the

books

Use synonyms

, it is important for families to restrict the amount of

time

Use synonyms

a child spends

infront

Correct your spelling

in front

of the TV and video

games

Use synonyms

Instead

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

, they should be encouraged to read a

well-writen

Correct your spelling

well-written

book to become a wealthy adult.

imaneslampanahiepTue Jan 30 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure the essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. The structure is generally adequate, but more attention needs to be given to the logical flow of ideas between and within paragraphs.

task achievement

Work on paraphrasing the question prompt in the introduction to avoid repeating it verbatim.

task achievement

Provide more specific examples to support your arguments. Contact with real data or studies can add substantial weight to an argument.

coherence cohesion

Be careful with spelling, grammar, and punctuation to improve the readability of your essay.

coherence cohesion

Enhance the complexity of sentence structures to achieve a higher band score. Use a variety of compound and complex sentences effectively.

task achievement

Work on the precision and accuracy of language. Misused words and unclear expressions can detract from the clarity of the essay.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
28
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

355 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Cognitive development
Screen time
Attention span
Academic performance
Physical exercise
Childhood obesity
Language skills
Creativity
Imagination
Empathy
Educational programs
Personal growth
Balanced approach
Interactive games
Media consumption
Self-regulation
Distractions
Technology-enhanced learning

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Children spend a lot of time watching TV and playing computer games, however it does not help in improving their mental abilities. Do you agree or disagree? .
It is common in the current days for many individuals to believe that offspring tend to take their time using technological equipment for entertainment despite it can not help them in absorbing useful knowledge. The author opposes this statement as TV and computer games may become negative issues.

Some people say that parents should place restrictions on the hours of their children spend watching TV and playing computer games, and encourage them to spend this time reading books instead. Do you agree or disagree?

Universities should accept equal numbers of male and female students in every subject. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

A young person will start work at your office next month to gain work experience. Write a letter to him/her. In your letter •inform him/her about the work that needs to be done at the office; •explain what he/she is supposed to do on the first day; •suggest what he/she should bring to work.

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Children spend a lot of time watching TV and playing computer games, however it does not help in improving their mental abilities. Do you agree or disagree? .