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Writing Samples
Band 7

The chart below shows the value of one countries exports in various categories during 2015 in 2016. The table shows the percentage change in each category of exports in 2016 compared with 2015.

The chart below shows the value of one countries exports in various categories during 2015 in 2016. The table shows the percentage change in each category of exports in 2016 compared with 2015.
The chart beneath depicts the export value of one country between 2015 and 2016. The table illustrates the difference in the ratio in each sector of export in 2015 and 2016.
Overall
Linking Words
, there were some fluctuations between the first and second years. Petroleum products were the highest achievers in both years.
While
Linking Words
 textiles were the losers in both years.
In addition
Linking Words
, the textiles gained quarter than the first
year
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, the gems and jewellery drained some ration in the second
year
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, petroleum products earned 60 $
billion
Use synonyms
 in the 1st
year
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 and almost 62 $
billion
Use synonyms
 in the 2nd
year
Use synonyms
 with the help of an increase of 3%.
While
Linking Words
 engineered goods gained 58 $
billion
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 in 2015 and 61 $
billion
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 in 2016 ranked up 8.5% ratio.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the gems and jewellery took 41 $
billion
Use synonyms
 in the first
year
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 and 40 $
billion
Use synonyms
 in the second
year
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 with a decreased ratio of 5.18% .
Secondly
Linking Words
, agricultural products earned 30 $
billion
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 in 2015 and almost 30.3 $
billion
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 ranked 0.81% which is not too much a percentage.
To sum up
Linking Words
, textiles earned 27 $
billion
Use synonyms
 in 1st
year
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 and 31 $
billion
Use synonyms
 in 2nd
year
Use synonyms
 with the help of an increase of 15.24%.
This
Linking Words
 was the highest gainer in 2016.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words year, billion with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • export categories
  • percentage change
  • economic implications
  • GDP (Gross Domestic Product)
  • fluctuations
  • international trade relationships
  • top-performing categories
  • least performing categories
  • export values
  • global market trends
  • export priorities
  • economic strategies
  • future prospects
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