You live in a small university town. Last week, you drove to a big city about two hours away to buy a new laptop at a good price. You worked on the the laptop all week and finished writing a long assignment that is due shortly. However, this week, the laptop does not even switch on. Write to the store. In your letter : Tell the store where you live & what happened Explain the problem with the laptop State what action you would like the store to take
Dear Sir or Madam.
I live in the
center
of Change the spelling
centre
the
small city.I am in order to complain about my new laptop. Correct article usage
a
Firstly
it was work excellent. I was working on my assignment with pleasure ,however
after a week it was switch
off Change the verb form
was switched
with
no reason. Because of your Change preposition
for
product
Add a comma
product,
i
have wasted my money and Change the capitalization
I
also
i
was very close to Change the capitalization
I
be loosen
my job. To make matters worse Change the verb form
loosen
i
came to your shop again, Change the capitalization
I
showed
my laptop to the assistant, but he was so rude to me Correct word choice
and showed
instead
of assist
me and Wrong verb form
assisting
i
feel Change the capitalization
I
dismay
among customers. I would be grateful if you Change the verb form
dismayed
get
rid of Wrong verb form
got
with
Change preposition
apply
this
assistant. However
the main problem with my laptop i look forward to receiving a full refund.
Yours sincerely
Mr Bear.Add a comma
However,
Submitted by omondavlat91 on
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Coherence and Cohesion
The letter lacks clear paragraphs which would help to organize the points you want to make. To improve, each key point of the prompt should be addressed in a separate paragraph: one for where you live and what happened, another for explaining the problem with the laptop, and a final one stating the action you want the store to take.
Greeting and Closing
While there is a greeting and a closing, they could be improved. Use 'Dear [Manager/Shop Name]' to make it more formal and personalized. Instead of 'Yours sincerely, Mr Bear', consider 'Yours faithfully' if you haven't used a name, followed by your full name.
Task Achievement
The task has been partially achieved but some required elements are missing or incomplete. Be specific about your university town and the big city, clarify what exactly happened to the laptop, and instead of demanding the removal of an employee, identify what you would like the store to do about the laptop itself.
Suitable Writing Tone
The tone of the letter should be formal and polite. Avoid expressions of anger or personal attacks on the staff, as this is not professional. Express your dissatisfaction politely and request assistance.
Structure your letter
A letter needs to be written using a proper format, including the following:
- A greeting (Dear sir/madam, Dear John, Dear Mr. Smith)
- The main body (consisting of paragraphs for each part of the letter)
- A closing (Yours sincerely, Yours faithfully, Best wishes, Kind regards, Love)
When writing a letter as part of the IELTS General Training Writing Task 1, it is important to include the bullet points presented to you in the question.
All three bullet points need to be presented. And remember that some bullet points contain more than one element. So, make sure to watch for ‘and’ and plurals.