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Band 5

the diagram below shows the stages in the recycling of aluminium drinks cans. Summaris the information by selectin and reporting the main features, and make comparisions where relevant.

the diagram below shows the stages in the recycling of aluminium drinks cans. Summaris the information by selectin and reporting the main features, and make comparisions where relevant.
#stages #aluminium #drinks #cans #summaris #information #selectin #features #comparisions
The given diagram
explain
Change the verb form
explains
show examples
 the process of recycling
cans
 through three stages
starts
Wrong verb form
starting
show examples
 from collecting
cans
 and ending up with
new
Change the word
newly
show examples
 made drinking
cans
.
Overall
, it can be seen that the moulding
used
Change preposition
of used
show examples
cans
 to new ones has three process stages, but there is one more different modification in the
aluminium
 plant and it
aslo
Correct your spelling
also
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 extra three platforms in
can
Correct article usage
the can
show examples
 moulding procedure. The whole experiment starts with collecting
cans
 from
collection
Correct article usage
the collection
show examples
 centre
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
which
cans
reached
Wrong verb form
reach
show examples
 at there destination recycling centre via
big
Correct article usage
a big
show examples
 truck. Moving forward to
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
 step
aluminium
 recycling plant where
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
 more
steps
Add the auxiliary verb
steps have
show examples
 been taken to make new
cans
. In
recycling
Correct article usage
the recycling
show examples
 plant stage collected
cans
 melt down
with
Change preposition
at
show examples
 high
temperature
Fix the agreement mistake
temperatures
show examples
 and new
aluminium
been
Wrong verb form
is
show examples
 created.
After
this
, the
aluminium
pressed
Add a missing verb
is pressed
show examples
 with heavy pressure to make
thin
Correct article usage
a thin
show examples
 layer roll for
cans
. Through
this
 whole
operation
Add a comma
operation,
show examples
 new
cans
 get
Submitted by  Mandeep on

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words cans, aluminium with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Sustainability
  • Recycling bins
  • Collection centers
  • Sorting
  • Debris
  • Compacting
  • Molten aluminium
  • Purification
  • Ingots
  • Rolled
  • Manufactured
  • Distribution
  • Energy consumption
  • Efficiency
  • Lifecycle
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