Some people feel that entertainers (e.g. film stars, pop musicians or sports stars) are paid too much money. Do you agree or disagree? Which other types of job should be highly paid?

To
comments
Correct subject-verb agreement
comment
show examples
with, There are many
poular
Correct your spelling
popular
person
Change to a plural noun
people
show examples
live in India. like Film
Actors
, pop singers and sports
person
also
many Businessmen and more. Few People
belive
Correct your spelling
believe
show examples
that those people
charga
Correct your spelling
charge
charged
a lot of
Money
For an
advartisemnet
Correct your spelling
advertisement
.
Also
Add a comma
Also,
show examples
some society
belive
Correct your spelling
believe
show examples
that their
person
helped to many
city
and country economy. In
this
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
I will discuss some pros and cons in below paragraph. On the First
said
Correct your spelling
side
show examples
of coins, There are many positive points all these guys to living in their
city
. Their
mans
Correct your spelling
men
show examples
and
femiles
Correct your spelling
females
families
donet
Correct your spelling
donate
their
money
many
Change preposition
to many
show examples
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
show examples
and
Correct article usage
the country
show examples
country
Change noun form
country's
show examples
economy. Many Business
person
spend their
money
to save the
city
's economy. like., tata, jio,
Relince
Correct your spelling
Reliance
, Adani and many more.As a reason, many sports
person
use their amount to open new
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
show examples
and
hospital
Fix the agreement mistake
hospitals
show examples
and
provied
Correct your spelling
provided
provide
education and free
helth
Correct your spelling
health
checkup
Fix the agreement mistake
checkups
show examples
.
As a result
, Akshay Kumar
donet
Correct your spelling
donate
their
money
schools
Change preposition
to schools
show examples
, Army and many bad
situation
Change to a plural noun
situations
show examples
like corona, bird flu and
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
. On the other said of coins, There are many
negetivs
Correct your spelling
negative
negatives
points
is
Correct your spelling
in
show examples
some
society's
Change noun form
societies
show examples
and many
Actors
do a lot of bad advertising and it is not
usefull
Correct your spelling
useful
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
and
youngstar
Correct your spelling
young stars
. Many
children's
Change noun form
children
show examples
and parents follow their many
Hero's
Change noun form
heroes
show examples
and
Actors
and they
looks
Change the verb form
look
show examples
their
Change preposition
at their
show examples
post
Fix the agreement mistake
posts
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
mobile and other technology. It is a bad impression in our
ganarsion
Correct your spelling
mansion
garrison
and
city
.For Explain, Many manstars
advertising
Wrong verb form
advertise
show examples
cold drinks and many others and they take more
money
.
hence
, Ajay
devegan
Change the capitalization
Devegan
show examples
advertis
Correct your spelling
advertises
nicotine products and their nicotine
eats
Change the verb form
eat
show examples
many young
chaild
Correct your spelling
child
and many humans.
For
Change preposition
In
show examples
conclusion, some people say that their
actors
and
sports man
Correct your spelling
sportsman
show examples
are helped
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
our
country's
Change noun form
country
show examples
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
many
defficul
Correct your spelling
difficult
situation
Change to a plural noun
situations
show examples
.
Other
Fix the agreement mistake
Others
show examples
think that their advertising are bad
imageing
Correct your spelling
image
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
our son and many
generation
Change to a plural noun
generations
show examples
.
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Introduction
The essay fails to provide a clear introduction with a thesis statement, which is key to a well-structured essay. Make sure to introduce the topic and clearly state your position in the introduction.
Logical Structure
The main ideas are somewhat difficult to follow due to a lack of clear topic sentences and logical progression of ideas. Improve coherence by organizing paragraphs with clear topic sentences and consistent follow-up explanations.
Conclusion
Include a conclusion that restates your main points and opinion succinctly. It should provide a clear end to your essay.
Main Points
Support your points with more relevant examples and explanations. This will make your arguments more convincing.
Ideas
Strive to present your ideas comprehensively; each paragraph should address a single aspect of the topic and explore it fully.
Examples
Use specific examples to support your views. They help in illustrating and reinforcing your arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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