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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the hours of teaching per year done by each teacher in four different countries in 2001. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the hours of teaching per year done by each teacher in four different countries in 2001. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#hours #year #teacher #four #countries #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The given bar graph depicts the
imformation
Correct your spelling
information
 about the
hours
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 of teaching per year done by each teacher in four different countries in 2001.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
hours
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 of teaching per year done by each teacher in
Japan
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 was the lowest in the four
contries
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countries
, next was
Spain
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 and
Iceland
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.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
Also,
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 USA was the highest
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 all
contries
Correct your spelling
countries
. In 2001, the
hours
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 at Primary in
Japan
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,
Spain
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 and
Iceland
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 remained relatively constant, at about 600
hours
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.
Besides
Linking Words
, the
hours
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 at Primary was the highest in four countries, at about 850
hours
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.
Linking Words
Moreover
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Moreover,
show examples
 the
hours
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 at Lower Secondary in
Japan
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 and
Spain
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is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 at approximately 600
hours
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,
then
Linking Words
Iceland
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 was the second at about 800
hours
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 and the USA was the highest at about 1080
hours
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. The
hours
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 at Upper Secondary in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Japan
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was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 the lowest at about 600
hours
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, next is
Iceland
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 with 790
hours
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,
then
Linking Words
 is
Spain
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 at about 990
hours
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 and the highest is
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
 at about 1090
hours
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by lyhuongclc on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 83%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words hours, japan, spain, iceland with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 8 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • annual hours of teaching
  • teaching workload
  • educational systems
  • teacher-student ratio
  • significantly
  • slightly
  • noticeably
  • gap
  • highest/lowest number of hours
  • compare
  • contrast
  • reflect
  • variations
  • distribution of teaching hours
  • average
  • respectively
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