IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Write a letter to show dissatisfaction after recieving bad customer service in a gym club.

#show #dissatisfaction #customer #service #gym #club
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I am writing
this
 letter to express my dissatisfaction with your customer service. I have recently joined your
gym
 club after
recieving
Correct your spelling
receiving
 good customer reviews on
official
Correct article usage
the official
show examples
 site of the club.
However
, I beg to differ. Unfortunately, some members of
this
 club don't care about the cleanliness of the environment. Some careless individuals don't wipe the dirt after using different
equipments
Correct your spelling
equipment
.
Furthermore
, few members not only throw dirty towels in
changing
Correct article usage
the changing
show examples
 room but
also
 show carelessness towards
cleanliness
Correct article usage
the cleanliness
show examples
 of the environment. I request you to make
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
ammendments
Correct your spelling
amendments
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the rules and regulations of the
gym
. I will recommend you
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
charge a heavy penalty to
gym
mrmbers
Correct your spelling
members
 who show negligence in cleanliness of the the
gym
.
Submitted by sb101tahirgul on

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Greeting and Closing
Include a polite greeting and closing to start and end your letter respectively, as they are standard in formal letter writing.
Logical Structure
A more structured approach with an introduction, body paragraphs focusing on specific issues, and a conclusion would enhance the logical structure.
Single Idea per Paragraph
Separate your points clearly into paragraphs and develop each idea fully for better coherence and single idea focus per paragraph.
Complete Response
Make sure that all parts of the task are addressed, talk about the experience, the problem, and request a specific solution.
Suitable Writing Tone
Use a more formal tone suitable for a complaint letter. Avoid overly casual language or a confrontational tone. Remain polite and professional.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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