IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Percentage of national consumer expenditure by category- 2002

#percentage #consumer #expenditure #category-
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The table displays
Add an article
the date
show examples
date
Correct your spelling
data
show examples
 on
percentage
Add an article
the percentage
a percentage
show examples
 of national customer expenditure by three categories in 2002 for five countries.
Overall
, the table shows that the vast majority of the highest
consumers
Fix the agreement mistake
consumer
show examples
 spending percentage is on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
food
/drinks/
tobacco
. On the other
Fix the agreement mistake
hand
show examples
hands
Add a comma
hands,
show examples
 it looks
that
Correct word choice
like
show examples
 purchasers are paying out less for
leisure
/
education
. In 2002
food
/drinks/
tobacco
have
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
 the greatest rate
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 customer expenditure
thus
 means that Turkey is
on
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the top of the list
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
ranking
32.14
Change preposition
at 32.14
show examples
% , and Ireland the second at 28.91%. Turkey
also
 had the highest percentage of purchaser spending on
leisure
 /
education
 at 4.35%. The most consumer spending in Spain is on
food
/drinks/
tobacco
 at 18.80%.
furthermore
Add a comma
furthermore,
show examples
 it
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
laying out the minimum ratio
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
leisure
/
education
 at 1.98% Italy and Sweden
shows
Change the verb form
show
show examples
 almost the same proportion
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
leisure
/
education
 at 3.30% and 3.22% respectively.
Moreover
,
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
both countries have less than 20% on
food
/drink/
tobacco
, but Italy led the pack on clothing/footwear expenditure at 9% .
Submitted by zx00154 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction and Conclusion
Ensure that an introduction clearly presents the overall purpose and content of the data being described, and try to include a conclusion that summarizes the key findings.
Logical Structure
Focus on structuring the essay logically, with clear paragraphing and transitions between ideas to guide the reader through your analysis.
Supported Main Points
Support main points with specific data and comparisons where relevant, to clearly show the relationships between the different categories and countries.
Complete Response
Address all parts of the task, ensuring that information for each category and country is included and clearly described.
Clear and Comprehensive Ideas
Clarify your ideas by using appropriate language to describe trends, comparisons, and percentages without ambiguity.
Relevant Specific Examples
Use relevant examples and data to support your analysis, and aim to include a varied range of sentence structures and vocabulary.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: