Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#countries #money #poverty #aid

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Giving

money

Use synonyms

to developing

countries

Use synonyms

from

wealthy

Add an article

a wealthy

show examples

Use synonyms

country

Fix the agreement mistake

countries

show examples

, will not be able to solve

Use synonyms

country's

Correct article usage

the country's

show examples

poverty

Use synonyms

. That's why

that

Correct determiner usage

apply

show examples

rich

countries

Use synonyms

should

support

Use synonyms

another type of

helps

Correct subject-verb agreement

help

show examples

instead

Linking Words

of financial

support

Use synonyms

. I completely agree with

this

Linking Words

opinion and in

this

Linking Words

essay, I will

stat

Correct your spelling

state

show examples

the reasons

Change preposition

for

show examples

my view. I completely agree with

this

Linking Words

opinion because giving financial aid

support

Use synonyms

would be

temporary

Add an article

a temporary

show examples

solution for poor

countries

Use synonyms

. It is true that supporting financial can

be solve

Change the verb form

solve

show examples

the

Use synonyms

countries'

Change noun form

country's

show examples

poverty

Use synonyms

for

Change preposition

show examples

Correct article usage

the

show examples

moment or short

terms

Fix the agreement mistake

term

show examples

, but helping them by supporting

Change preposition

apply

show examples

education will be the better solution for the long term.

This

Linking Words

is because

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

the main reason

Change preposition

for

show examples

poverty

Use synonyms

lack

Correct article usage

the lack

show examples

good

Correct article usage

a good

show examples

education system in that

country

Use synonyms

For instance

Linking Words

, our

country

Use synonyms

myanmar

Change the capitalization

Myanmar

show examples

is poor and

get

Wrong verb form

has gotten

show examples

a lot of help

Change preposition

from

show examples

rich

countries

Use synonyms

like Japan and

USA

Correct article usage

the USA

show examples

since the years ago.But most of the help

are

Change the verb form

show examples

building a bridge and donating

money

Use synonyms

to use for necessary things. By use of these, our government can solve the problem for a

while

Linking Words

, after that we

are

Verb problem

will

show examples

still

keep

Verb problem

be as

show examples

poor as usual.

And the

Correct word choice

The

show examples

most

reason

Correct word choice

important reason

show examples

for holding to my view is that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

financial

aids

Change the noun form

aid

show examples

support

Use synonyms

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

not

important

Rephrase

as important

show examples

as helping these

countries

Use synonyms

to develop in their

tourism

Use synonyms

field. The

tourism

Use synonyms

business is a great one to increase the

country

Use synonyms

's foreign income. That's why

wealthy

Add an article

the wealthy

a wealthy

show examples

Use synonyms

country

Fix the agreement mistake

countries

show examples

should

support

Use synonyms

develope

Correct your spelling

development

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

tourism

Use synonyms

poor

Add an article

the poor

show examples

Use synonyms

country

Fix the agreement mistake

countries

show examples

instead

Linking Words

of giving

money

Use synonyms

Additionally

Linking Words

those

Change the determiner

that country

those countries

show examples

country

Use synonyms

who get the help will know how to find the

money

Use synonyms

from

tourism

Use synonyms

Linking Words

Moreover

Add a comma

Moreover,

show examples

they will

be know

Change the verb form

be known

show examples

by upgrading the

tourism

Use synonyms

field and they will

be reach

Change the verb form

reach

show examples

the way to rich. In conclusion, I totally agree with the opinion that supporting financial

aids

Fix the agreement mistake

aid

show examples

can not resolve the

poverty

Use synonyms

country

Add an article

the country

show examples

This

Linking Words

is because getting

money

Use synonyms

is not a way to

rich

Add a missing verb

be rich

show examples

, having

the

Remove the article

apply

show examples

enough knowledge and constant income are the main facts of wealthy.

Submitted by mr.shinephonemyat on Mon Feb 05 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Make sure to fully address the prompt by providing a balanced discussion that considers both sides of the argument before presenting your own view.

task achievement

Develop your arguments with clear, focused main points and use a variety of supports like data, quotes, or detailed examples to strengthen your essay's persuasive power.

coherence and cohesion

Use paragraphs effectively to structure your essay. Make sure there is a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should contain one main idea and be clearly separated from others.

coherence and cohesion

Work on linking your ideas and paragraphs more smoothly with a range of cohesive devices (e.g., moreover, however, therefore, etc.) to improve the flow of your essay.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure that your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points of your essay and re-states your position. It should be clear and concise, providing a strong sense of closure.

coherence and cohesion

Check for grammatical errors and typos to avoid detracting from the professionalism of your writing. Simple mistakes can be easily overlooked and impact the overall quality of your essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
45
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

315 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

poverty alleviation
economic inequality
developing nations
foreign aid
sustainable growth
technical assistance
expertise
infrastructure
education
fair trade
trade barriers
sustainable development
environmental conservation

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
ome people say that art subjects such as painting or drawing should not be made compulsory for high school students. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Some people hold the view that art subjects including painting and drawing are unnecessary to learning at high school. From my observation, I suppose that art subjects are optional for students while they have to learn many important academic disciplines, which I will discuss in this essay.
6
band
Some people believe that educational success depends on good teachers, while others believe that students’ attitudes are important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
While it is argued that academic achievements are decided by talented educators, some assume that learners’ perspectives are far more crucial. Although the positive reactions of trainees might play an important role in helping learners achieve learning accomplishments, I believe that good teachers may have far more significant impacts on studying results.
7.5
band
Some people say that it is possible for a country to be both economically successful and have a clean environment. Others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
People have different views on sustainable development. While some people argue that it is impossible to simultaneously succeed in economic development and environmental protection, I believe that we can achieve both targets.
7
band
Write about the following topic. It is often argued that it is difficult to get children to read. Why do you think this is? What measures could be taken to encourage children to read more? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should spend about 40 minutes on this task
It is still debatable whether nowadays many children are not reading fluently. This essay will explain why this phenomenon could happen and how to encourage children's reading fluency.
5.5
band
In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?
Instead of staying in rented house, it is preferred to stay in own home in many places of the world. This essay will discuss the possible causes of this situation an also in my opinion it is positive thing, and I will advocate in the favor of my Opinion.

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

ome people say that art subjects such as painting or drawing should not be made compulsory for high school students. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that educational success depends on good teachers, while others believe that students’ attitudes are important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people say that it is possible for a country to be both economically successful and have a clean environment. Others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?