Learning English at school is often seen as more important than learning local languages. If these are not taught, many are at risk of dying out. In your opinion, is it important for everyone to learn English? Should we try to ensure the survival of local languages and, i1 so, how?
in
the
modern life, it is required to be bilingual which is why many Correct article usage
apply
people
try to master the English
language
forgetting about their native language
. Is it right to pay attention to development
Correct article usage
the development
teaching
foreign Change preposition
of teaching
language
Fix the agreement mistake
languages
instead
of preserving own tongue
? In my opinion
preserving Add a comma
opinion,
mother
Correct article usage
the mother
language
has more prioritize
than Replace the word
priority
be
able to speak fluently in Wrong verb form
being
international
Add an article
an international
the international
language
.
Knowing and having Add an article
an advance
advance
level in Replace the word
advanced
English
has a lot of advantages without any doubts. It is known state, following
this
majority of parents sent their child
to international schools. Knowing Fix the agreement mistake
children
English
seems for
Change preposition
to
people
like a gate to Correct article usage
the hole
hole
Correct your spelling
whole
world
, convenient travelling, having opportunity
to be Add an article
the opportunity
an opportunity
international
student in abroad, being confident about employment with Add an article
an international
high
salary and Correct article usage
a high
such
reasons to learn widely
used Correct article usage
a widely
tongue
endless
. Correct word choice
apply
However
Add a comma
However,
English
gives not only speaking skills to learners, beside give
another understanding of the Correct subject-verb agreement
gives
world
. In consequence that well educated
Add a hyphen
well-educated
people
will know how important to preserve their unique native language
.
I strongly believe that traditional culture based
on Add a missing verb
is based
language
. Language
is not only Correct article usage
a communicated
communicated
Replace the word
communication
tool
, it is also
tool
to accept Add an article
a tool
world
by Correct article usage
the world
own
version. Correct pronoun usage
its own
Definitely
when local Add a comma
Definitely,
people
lose this
own version Change the word
their
accepting
Change preposition
of accepting
world
it threats to lose all culture starting with Correct article usage
the world
local
Correct article usage
the local
language
. Due
to
government should encourage Change preposition
apply
Correct article usage
the developing
developing
and preserving Replace the word
development
mother
Correct article usage
the mother
tongue
, in
addition
local citizens should speak with close Add a comma
addition,
people
in mother
Correct pronoun usage
their mother
tongue
.
In conclusion, English
is like a tool
to improve yourself and your level of education level, mother
language
is tool
to improve your mental health and Add an article
a tool
accepting
the Wrong verb form
accept
world
.Submitted by kazbek.baimukhambetov on
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task achievement
Your essay touches upon the essential elements of the topic but should present a more balanced view considering both the importance of English and the preservation of local languages. Aim to clarify your position with a more nuanced argument and acknowledge the counterpoint more explicitly.
task achievement
Your main points are generally clear but occasionally get lost in translation due to a lack of precise language and grammatical control. Work on refining your vocabulary and sentence construction to more effectively communicate your ideas.
task achievement
Include specific examples and evidence to support your point of view. This could be in the form of statistics, personal experiences, or hypothetical scenarios that are directly relevant to your argument.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a discernible progression of ideas but lacks coherence in places due to awkward language and unclear connections between ideas. Focus on using clear linking words and well-structured paragraphs to guide the reader through your argument.
coherence cohesion
There is an attempt at an introduction and conclusion, but they could be improved by being more explicit in their purpose. The introduction should clearly state your thesis, while the conclusion should succinctly summarize your main points and reiterate your thesis.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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