Some people believe that it would be beneficial if employees worked three or four days per week rather than five or six days. Why is this? Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is claimed that there exists opinion about positive consequences of reducing the working week from 5 or 6 days to 3 or 4.
However
, not all understand how it will work and why it can be lucrative for companies to apply
this
method. First of all, it is obvious that now people live in extremely difficult times when every year brings new obstacles and we have to struggle with them.
Therefore
, the amount of stress we have is increasing annually. They suffer from terrible work and chronic sleep deprivation
due to
all the things that are going on today in the world.
Hence
, they do not spend enough moments with their relatives and friends which can support them in difficult periods. So
that
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
, more weekends will help them to maintain a certain level of psychological, physical and mental state which can provide better results at work.
Secondly
, another possible reason for applying
this
system is a lack of time for self-education and self-improvement for workers.
Moreover
, people working 5 or even 6 days a week want only one thing to do on their weekend and, of course, it is not studying or going to cultural events. Most workers just watch TV, scroll social media, chat with friends and so on.
Although
, if they have more days off, it will allow them to allocate their spare time to different activities. They can start learning a new language, online
course
Fix the agreement mistake
courses
show examples
, reading a book, attending exhibitions or galleries and going to museums and theatres. In general, it will provide an increase in the level of literacy and skills for employees that can help companies raise the quality of goods and services they sell. In conclusion, I would like to say that it is really important to control the state of workers because it affects their productivity, so it is necessary to give them more opportunities to stabilize their condition.
Besides
, additional weekends will give an opportunity for education that in the future will be very beneficial for firms.
Submitted by ddoiron on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence & Cohesion
To improve the logical structure of your essay, make sure to clearly outline your main points in the introduction, providing a guidepost for the reader. Additionally, strive for a more seamless transition between ideas, ensuring that each paragraph logically follows from the one before.
Coherence & Cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are both present, which is good. However, the conclusion could be improved by summarizing the main points more effectively and reinforcing your argument. Remember, the conclusion should reflect upon the points made throughout the essay.
Coherence & Cohesion
To better support your main points, make use of more detailed examples and data. This will strengthen your argument and help illustrate your points more effectively. Personal anecdotes or referencing studies could enhance the quality of your examples.
Task Achievement
You have responded to the task prompt sufficiently, but to achieve a higher score, ensure that your ideas are expanded upon with detailed explanations, not just assertions. The clarity of your argument can be improved by providing more comprehensive reasons and outcomes associated with the reduced work week.
Task Achievement
Provide specific examples to illustrate your ideas. These could be drawn from current research, historical cases, or well-known business practices. The examples should be directly relevant to your argument and serve to substantiate your points.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • work-life balance
  • productive
  • workplace stress
  • employee well-being
  • employment opportunities
  • carbon emissions
  • traffic congestion
  • flexibility
  • personal interests
  • implementation
  • workload
  • customer service
  • business operations
What to do next:
Look at other essays: