Governments should ban dangerous sports. Others think that people should have the freedom to do any sport activity. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#governments #ban #sports #people #freedom #sport #activity

Government

Correct article usage

The government

show examples

should prohibit

ban

Verb problem

apply

show examples

risky

sports

This

essay

disagree

Change the verb form

disagrees

show examples

this

Change preposition

with this

show examples

idea because

people

can

expess

Correct your spelling

express

their emotions

also

it can be harmful

for

Change the preposition

show examples

their health.

Government

Correct article usage

The government

show examples

should ban dangerous

sports

because some

sports

are harmful to a person's life. Sometimes

people

will die

after

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

dangerous spots. Doing unsafe

sports

you can have

physically

Change the adverb

physical

show examples

problems like breaking your leg or arms.

For example

, claiming to high

mountain

Fix the agreement mistake

mountains

show examples

also

riding motorcycles in high places. Another reason doing hazardous

sports

help

Correct subject-verb agreement

helps

show examples

people

let off their steam

also

Rephrase

is that

show examples

some

people

relaxed

Wrong verb form

relax

show examples

claiming high mountains.

For example

have

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

a type of person

not

Add a missing verb

does not

show examples

communicate with other

people

and sometimes

this

person

wanted

Add the particle

wanted to

show examples

express their bad feelings and emotions to the outside, that’s why they are doing dangerous activities to get rid of bad emotions.

However

, in most

cases

Add a comma

cases,

show examples

it is dangerous for

people

to engage in extreme

sports

. In conclusion, hazardous

sports

damaging

Add a missing verb

are damaging

show examples

to a human’s life, and it’s

better

Add an article

a better

the better

show examples

way for

people

get

Fix the infinitive

to get

show examples

rid of their lousy

problematic

Replace the word

problems

show examples

Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on Mon Feb 12 2024

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task achievement

Make sure to introduce both sides of the argument clearly in your introduction, followed by a thesis statement indicating your personal stance.

coherence and cohesion

Use clear and distinct paragraphs for each main point. Start each paragraph with a topic sentence that explains the main idea you will discuss.

task achievement

Provide specific examples to support each argument you make. This will make your essay more convincing and demonstrate your understanding of the topic.

task achievement

End your essay with a conclusion that summarises both views and restates your opinion. This will provide a clear closure to your argument.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure logical and smooth transitions between sentences and paragraphs. This helps in maintaining the flow of your essay and making it easy to follow.

coherence and cohesion

Check for grammatical errors and work on improving your sentence structure. This will enhance the overall readability of your essay.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

165 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Governments should ban dangerous sports. Others think that people should have the freedom to do any sport activity. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Your opinion

A lot of old people are suffering from loneliness these days. They also lack physical fitness. What do you think are the reasons for this problem? Can you think of possible solutions?

Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

It is important to be concerned about international events, even if those events have no direct impact on our lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?