Some people like to spend their leisure time with their colleagues, while others prefer to keep their private life separate from their work life. Is it a good thing to spend leisure time with colleagues?

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In the present climate,

due to

Linking Words

inevitable alterations that have

been

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

occurred in the educational environment, many have a tendency to allocate their recreational activity time to their colleagues.

Linking Words

While some

Correct word choice

Some

show examples

individuals prefer to keep their personal

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

with their colleagues separately. In my opinion, possibly damaging the

limitations

Use synonyms

between people in an educational environment results in a destructive way. One justification could be fading

limitations

Use synonyms

between students and teachers, causing various misunderstandings and complicated situations. Specifically, schools that include a younger range of student, are not able to distinguish their boundaries accurately. Take,

for instance

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, a case that has been observed, a teacher has an intimate relationship with a colleague’s family and spends time with their child,

as a consequence

Linking Words

of friendship between them, the student has said something personal about the teacher to other classmates which has brought difficulties. There have,

however

Linking Words

, been, it should be noted that, in order to

evolution

Replace the word

evolve

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in an educational environment

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

smooth relations between students and teachers have some advantages. Another explanation for preserving

limitations

Use synonyms

among pupils and advisers is, that tend to separate their personal lives from their work and are conscious of subsequences. To clarify, when the

limitations

Use synonyms

exist, students are not able to indulge in making sounds

as well as

Linking Words

being rude.

As a result

Linking Words

, the teacher can control the whole class simply.

To conclude

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, from what has been discussed above,

Although

Linking Words

regarding

Change preposition

apply

show examples

modifications in the educational system cause destroying

limitations

Use synonyms

, it can discover a way and impose legislation to prevent probable difficulties.

ashkanmlk80Tue Feb 13 2024

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task achievement

The essay topic was misunderstood: it's about spending leisure time with colleagues, not the educational environment. Make sure to read and understand the question properly before starting your essay.

coherence & cohesion

Provide a clear introduction that outlines your position and previews the main points. End with a conclusion summarizing the key arguments and restating your opinion.

coherence & cohesion

Your essay lacks clear and logical progression. Ideas should connect smoothly with the use of linking phrases. Right now, the points feel disjointed.

task achievement

Include more specific examples to support your arguments. These help clarify your points and make your essay more persuasive.

general

Pay attention to grammatical errors and sentence structures. Improving these will make your essay easier to understand and follow.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

254 words

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Some people like to spend their leisure time with their colleagues, while others prefer to keep their private life separate from their work life. Is it a good thing to spend leisure time with colleagues?

Your opinion

People aim to achieve a balance between their work and personal life, but few people achieve it. What are the causes of the problem? How to overcome it?

An increasing number of professionals such as doctors and teachers are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? what can be done to deal with this situation?

During the 20th century, contact between different parts from the world has developed rapidly thanks to air travel and telecommunication. To what extent do you agree that societies benefit from the increased contact and closer relationships with foreigners brought by international?

What are the advantages and disadvantages of tourism?

Nowadays many people have access to computers on a wide basis and a large number of children play computer games. What are the negative impacts of playing computer games and what can be done to minimize the bad effects.