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Band 6.5

he first chart below shows the percentages of women and men in a country involved in some kinds of home tasks (cooking, cleaning, pet caring and repairing the house). The second chart shows the amount of time each gender spent on each task per day. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

he first chart below shows the percentages of women and men in a country involved in some kinds of home tasks (cooking, cleaning, pet caring and repairing the house). The second chart shows the amount of time each gender spent on each task per day. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#first #percentages #women #men #country #kinds #home #tasks #pet #house #second #amount #time #gender #information #features #comparisons
The first
given
Verb problem
apply
show examples
bar
chart
 illustrates the percentages of women and men in a country involved in some
kinds
Fix the agreement mistake
kind
show examples
 of home task.The second diagram
chart
repersent
Correct your spelling
represent
represents
 the average
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
time
each
Change preposition
for each
show examples
 task per day.
Overall
, the first
chart
Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
show examples
provide
Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
show examples
 the
percentage
 of
Fix the agreement mistake
men
show examples
man
Fix the agreement mistake
men
show examples
 and
Fix the agreement mistake
women
show examples
woman
Fix the agreement mistake
women
show examples
Correct pronoun usage
who do
show examples
do
Correct pronoun usage
who do
show examples
housework
 and the second
chart
show
Correct subject-verb agreement
shows
show examples
 the average
time
Change preposition
apply
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
males
 and
females
Wrong verb form
doing
show examples
do
Wrong verb form
doing
show examples
housework
.
Firstly
,the
percentage
 of
females
do
Correct pronoun usage
who do
show examples
housework
 is higher than
males
,But in house repairs and pet care the
percentage
 of
males
 is
little
Correct article usage
a little
show examples
 higher than
females
.The
percentage
 of
females
 cooking is
recored
Correct your spelling
recorded
required
 to be at the top of the list at over 80 per cent.
Secondly
,The
percentage
 is the lowest
housework
also
 belongs to women in house repairs below 20 per cent.
Finally
, The average
time
 of
man
Fix the agreement mistake
men
show examples
do
Wrong verb form
doing
show examples
housework
 is lower than
woman
Fix the agreement mistake
women
show examples
 but the average of house repairs is higher than
females
.The average
time
 do pet care is
equality
Replace the word
equal
show examples
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 20 minutes.
Through
Correct your spelling
Though
show examples
 we can see the
percentage
 and the average
time
 of
males
 and
females
 to do homework
Submitted by lyhuongclc on

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words chart, time, percentage, housework, males, females with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentages" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 7 times.
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