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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

This graph shows the proportion of four different materials that were recycled from 1982 to 2010 in a particular country. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, making comparisons where relevant.

This graph shows the proportion of four different materials that were recycled from 1982 to 2010 in a particular country. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, making comparisons where relevant.
#proportion #four #materials #country #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The following graph illustrates the distribution of four different recycled components between 1982 and 2010 in a specific country.
Overall
Linking Words
, all components were increased gradually except for the aluminium cans which witnessed a significant growth among others. In terms of glass containers and paper &
cardboard
Add a comma
cardboard,
show examples
 both started with more than 45
percents
Fix the agreement mistake
percent
show examples
 in 1982. Paper and cardboard as the highest recycled materials went
fluctuative
Correct your spelling
fluctuating
 and reached
it's
Replace the word
its
show examples
peak
Use synonyms
 in 1994 before
decreased
Wrong verb form
decreasing
show examples
 gradually and
hit
Wrong verb form
hitting
show examples
 70% in 2010. Similar
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 paper and cardboard, glass containers
also
Linking Words
 dropped and hit the bottom in 1990 at 40%.
Thus
Linking Words
, it rose moderately and
touch
Wrong verb form
touched
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
peak
Use synonyms
 at 60% in 2010. Regarding
another materials
Replace the adjective
another material
other materials
show examples
,
alumininium
Correct your spelling
aluminium
 cans and plastics
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
were used after
Change the article
the year
show examples
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
1986 and 1990 respectively. Both were started at the same score, less than 10%. Plastics
was witnessing
Wrong verb form
witnessed
show examples
 a slight
rising
Replace the word
rise
show examples
at
Change preposition
over
show examples
 the
last
Linking Words
 ten years
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and touched
it's
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
peak
Use synonyms
 at around 9%.
However
Linking Words
,
alumininium
Correct your spelling
aluminium
 cans experienced the greatest change among others. It increased dramatically and multiplied
into
Change preposition
apply
show examples
around 8 times,
hit
Wrong verb form
hitting
show examples
it's
Replace the word
its
show examples
peak
Use synonyms
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2010 with
score
Add an article
a score
show examples
around
Change preposition
of around
show examples
 45%.
Submitted by adibah.r on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words peak with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • proportion
  • recycled
  • materials
  • increased
  • paper and cardboard
  • plastic
  • glass
  • metal
  • significant increase
  • relatively stable
  • fluctuating
  • period
  • starting
  • reaching
  • gradually increasing
  • remained low
  • experienced
  • showed
  • greatest
  • proportion
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