online shopping seems to be replacing the traditional method of buying. however some buyers are sceptical to this practice. discuss both benefits and risks associated with online shopping

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Online shopping has become a big trend lately, especially in
this
digital era. In
this
essay
Add a comma
essay,
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we will discuss how online shopping has become an alternative to the traditional way of purchasing directly from the store. We are now in a generation where everything can be obtained easily and
quicker
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quickly
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. Online shopping, or e-shopping, has become a big thing as a lot of platforms support it. Even through social media platforms
such
as Instagram and TikTok, we are able to purchase items that we want directly, and people from any generation are able to easily purchase things online without any confusion or hardship, just a simple click and your items will be delivered to your hand. Not only big brands have the privilege to sell their items online, but
also
small shop owners or young entrepreneurs who seek to start their own businesses. We cannot deny how online shopping is beneficial to both parties—the seller and
buyer
Correct article usage
the buyer
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. Take
this
example
for instance
, a local small shop owner from Indonesia wants to enter the digital market by selling their crocheted bags. But, the public market interest for crochets in Indonesia isn't as big as it is in Australia. With online shopping, the seller can put up their
products
in the market and reach potential customers from other parts of the world easily, as they only need to ship the package to the international customer. Not only that the customer
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
be
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delighted with their purchase,
the
Correct word choice
but the
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Indonesian seller will totally benefit
by
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from
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the currency differences as she received the Australian dollar, which is way more powerful than the Indonesian rupiah.
However
, there is always a disadvantage that comes with an advantage. In
this
case, the ones that I want to highlight the most are scams. With how easy it is to put your
products
online, it means that there is no quality check on the
products
that are sold online, especially on sites
such
as Amazon, Temu, or Wish. It's pretty easy to spot scams where you will be able to pay for the
products
, yet when they arrive, they'll be a whole different thing than what you ordered
,
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apply
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or none at all. I, myself, as an avid digital shopping enthusiast, have been scammed multiple times.
That is
why we need to become smart customers and learn how to spot these scams. Choose online shopping platforms that are verified and read the reviews to make sure you will be getting what you are hoping for. To summarize, online shopping definitely has a lot of advantages that come with it. Yet, we as
the
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apply
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customer
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customers
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need to know how to shop smart, in order to avoid the disadvantages that
comes
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come
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with it.
Submitted by tiana29.alisjahbana on

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Task Achievement
To enhance task response, delve deeper into the topic by providing more detailed analysis and discussion on both benefits and risks. Represent a balanced view by allocating equal depth of discussion to both sides of the argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Introduce a wider range of cohesive devices and paragraphing techniques to improve the logical flow of ideas. This will help in making the essay more coherent and logically structured.
Coherence and Cohesion
Incorporate a clear topic sentence at the beginning of each paragraph to guide the reader on what the paragraph will discuss. Follow this with supporting details and examples to strengthen your main points.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • unparalleled convenience
  • vast selection
  • digital platforms
  • comparison shopping
  • impulsive buying
  • aggressive marketing tactics
  • risk of fraud
  • counterfeit goods
  • compromised personal data
  • immediate satisfaction
  • physical examination
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