Developments in science and technology have caused environmental problems.Some people think that a simpler way of life will protect the environment,whileothers believe that science and technology can solve environmental problems.Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
In the current century,
science
and technology
are developing rapidly and there are new inventions and discoveries almost every year. Some people say that these developments are against the environment
, while
others believe that science
improvement is actually beneficial for it. I am mostly inclined to agree with the former opinion, as in my point of view, the downfalls of Replace the word
scientific
technology
outweights
its benefits.
The folks who believe that we should stop developing Correct your spelling
outweighs
outweigh
science
and technology
argue that these processes harm animals
and the environment
. The experiments that scientists perform on animals
to achieve scientific results kills
them or negatively Correct subject-verb agreement
kill
modifies
their genetic features. Correct subject-verb agreement
modify
Also
, technology
has provided super computers
which produce a massive amount of heat that ultimately leads to global warming. Correct your spelling
supercomputers
As a result
, many animal habitats will be jeopardized. Therefore
, the more we go furthur
in inventions and discoveries, the more damage we provide for Correct your spelling
further
the
nature.
Correct article usage
apply
On the other hand
, some people say that science
and technology
can rescue the environment
and animals
by the treats they offer. They can lead scientists to cure many diseases of animals
and plants. For instance
, with the invention of the 3D printer, some missing body parts of parrots or turtles could be replaced. Additionally
, they facilitate the irrigation of protected forests which are the habitats for many living creatures. Hence
, proceeding in science
and IT can be beneficial for the environment
since it helps solving
the issues of Wrong verb form
solve
the
nature.
Correct article usage
apply
Overall
, in my opinion, although
the progression in scientific matters has awsome
results, its Correct your spelling
awesome
pitfuls
are more than its advantages for the Correct your spelling
pitfalls
environment
. It causes the death of creatures and damages the earth by the increase in global warming. It is recommended that some boundaries be set for researches
and inventions so they have the least negative effect on the Fix the agreement mistake
research
environment
.Submitted by mohamad.sanaye462 on
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task achievement
Your essay provides a good comparison of views about the impact of science and technology on the environment. However, it tends to be slightly unbalanced, with more emphasis on the negative effects. Try to dedicate equal attention to both viewpoints to fully address the question. Additionally, ensure your conclusion succinctly summarizes both perspectives before stating your opinion.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a logical structure, but you could enhance coherence by using a wider range of linking words and phrases to better connect your ideas. For example, instead of simply starting paragraphs with 'On the other hand,' you might use phrases like 'Conversely,' or 'However, proponents of the opposite view argue that...'. This will make your argumentation smoother and easier to follow.
coherence cohesion
While your main points are supported, try to incorporate more specific examples or evidence to strengthen your arguments. For instance, instead of general statements about the harm to animals, you could mention specific studies or statistics. Similarly, for the benefits of technology, citing concrete innovations or scientific breakthroughs would make your points more compelling.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example