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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The bar chart compares the proportion of boys and girls who participated in various sports in the year 2002

The bar chart compares the proportion of boys and girls who participated in various sports in the year 2002
The graph
illatrates
Correct your spelling
illustrates
 about the
number
Use synonyms
 of boys and
girls
Use synonyms
participated
Correct pronoun usage
who participated
show examples
Use synonyms
Change preposition
in sport
show examples
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
 in an English town in 2021. The figure gives the
number
Use synonyms
 of percentages.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that mostly the
number
Use synonyms
 of
mens
Correct your spelling
men
 playing football
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2012. In
addtion
Correct your spelling
addition
, hockey
sport
Use synonyms
 was
least
Correct article usage
the least
show examples
 participated by
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
both boys and
girls
Use synonyms
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2012. Looking
in to
Join the words
into
show examples
 the figure, the
propotion
Correct your spelling
proportion
 between men who
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
participated
tennis
Change preposition
in tennis
show examples
 and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
girls
Use synonyms
 who
were join
Wrong verb form
joined
show examples
 swimming, the
number
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 of both's to be equal
50
Change preposition
to 50
show examples
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in 2012. Meanwhile, the
number
Use synonyms
 of percentages
Change preposition
of mens
show examples
mens
Correct your spelling
men
means
 who
were join
Change the verb form
joined
show examples
 activate swimming more than genters who
were joins
Change the verb form
joined
show examples
badmineton
Correct your spelling
badminton
 activities.
However
Linking Words
, the
sport
Use synonyms
 is
determination
Replace the word
determined
show examples
 in
genter
Correct your spelling
greater
 group are football
Use synonyms
sport has
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
Correct article usage
a percentages
show examples
percentages
Fix the agreement mistake
percentage
show examples
60
Change preposition
of 60
show examples
percent
Use synonyms
 in 2012 which more than other
acitivities
Correct your spelling
activities
.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the
hockrt
Correct your spelling
hockey
sport
Use synonyms
 has
teenager
Replace the word
teenage
show examples
girls
Use synonyms
 least
Correct your spelling
participated
participed
Correct your spelling
participated
 around 9
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 but the
propstion
Correct your spelling
proportion
proposition
 of
Correct your spelling
means
mens
Correct your spelling
men
show examples
 that activity more
Linking Words
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
girls
Use synonyms
 by
Correct your spelling
approximately
appoximately
Correct your spelling
approximately
 4
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in 2012

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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, girls, sport, percent with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 5 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 3 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Proportion
  • Participation
  • Gender disparity
  • Societal norms
  • Physical demands
  • Sports facilities
  • Traditional gender roles
  • Inclusiveness
  • Accessibility
  • Appeal
  • Gender equality
  • Contemporary trends
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