Some people think that men and women have different qualities Therefore some certain jobs are suitable for men and some jobs are suitable for women. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #men #women #qualities #jobs

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Sexual distinction has been one of the most serious problems

Change preposition

apply

show examples

around the world

during

Change preposition

for

show examples

many decades.

Although

Linking Words

Wrong verb form

has been

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reduced dramatically in recent modern society,

this

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still occurs in

some

Correct quantifier usage

apply

show examples

certain aspects

such

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as occupation.

This

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writer strongly disagrees with

this

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statement and

believe

Correct subject-verb agreement

believes

show examples

that gender equality should be prioritized. Despite having different characteristics,

both

Use synonyms

genders have main factors leading to success. Obviously, intelligence and sensitivity play a pivotal role in

successful

Add an article

a successful

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career, particularly business and

both

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men and women can

also

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have these features. Take Sheryl Sandberg who is the CEO of Facebook which is the biggest entertaining app

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show examples

the world

for instance

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. When mentioning

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apply

show examples

this

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social media network, people usually think about Mark Zuckerberg who is the founder;

however

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, in order to turn into popular at the moment, the contribution of Sheryl Sandberg is priceless. Another key consideration is that women, nowadays, become more sociable and they are willing to face risks in order to confirm their ability which completely contrasts with their shyness in the past. In

this

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era, female

become

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becomes

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tougher with their decisions

instead

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of being afraid of

the

Correct article usage

apply

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pinching from others. The most obvious evidence is sports, especially football

that

Correct word choice

where

show examples

not only men but

also

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their female counterparts can

also

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enjoy

this

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game and play some exciting matches.

For example

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, Nguyen Huynh Nhu, who is the captain of

Vietnam

Change noun form

Vietnam's

show examples

national female football team, is the symbol of

this

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country

due to

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her successful career in Portugal. In conclusion,

although

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both

Use synonyms

male

Fix the agreement mistake

males

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and

female

Fix the agreement mistake

females

show examples

still have some limitations, they have the right to

purchase

Verb problem

pursue

show examples

their passion and are

also

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allowed to enjoy their own life.

Hence

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this

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writer argues that people in

both

Use synonyms

genders can do whatever jobs as long as they love it and can earn living money on it.

Mon Feb 19 2024

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introduction conclusion present

Introduction and Conclusion: Ensure the introduction clearly outlines your stance on the topic, and the conclusion succinctly summarizes your argument, restating your opinion. It was good that both were present but strive for more precision and directness in presenting your viewpoint.

logical structure

Logical Structure: Your essay should have a logical flow, with each paragraph introducing a new point that supports your overall argument. Consider using clearer transitions between paragraphs to guide the reader more smoothly from one point to the next.

supported main points

Supported Main Points: Provide more diverse examples and evidence to support your main points. While the examples given are relevant, incorporating varying forms of evidence (e.g., statistical data, studies, or a wider range of examples) could enhance your argument.

complete response

Complete Response: Address all parts of the prompt thoroughly. Your essay touches on the main points but could delve deeper into why certain perceptions exist and how overcoming these stereotypes can be beneficial to society.

clear comprehensive ideas

Clear, Comprehensive Ideas: Ensure each paragraph presents a clear and focused point. While you have good ideas, refining and focusing each paragraph's main idea could improve comprehension and impact.

relevant specific examples

Relevant, Specific Examples: Continue to use specific examples as you did with Sheryl Sandberg and Nguyen Huynh Nhu, as they strengthen your argument. Remember to explain how each example supports your claim in more depth.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

299 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

gender roles
inherent qualities
social dynamics
merit-based selection
advancements in technology
levelled the playing field
gender stereotypes
equal opportunities
physical differences
workplace
evolving
traditional view

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Some people think that men and women have different qualities Therefore some certain jobs are suitable for men and some jobs are suitable for women. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Your opinion

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people claim that it is unfair to have same age limit in works.Do you agree or disagree?

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extend do you disagree or disagree with this statement?

Nowadays, many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? what could be the disadvantages of being self-employed .