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Band 6.5

The line graph shows the birth rate, population growth rate and death rate from 1940 until 2020 in Scotland. The three different veriables are measured in percentages

The line graph shows the birth rate, population growth rate and death rate from 1940 until 2020 in Scotland. The three different veriables are measured in percentages
#line #birth #rate #population #growth #death #scotland #three #veriables #percentages
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The graph depicts demographic trends in percentages which
consists
Correct subject-verb agreement
consist
show examples
 of three different categories
such
Linking Words
 as
birth
Use synonyms
rate
Use synonyms
, population growth
rate
Use synonyms
 and death
rate
Use synonyms
 in Scotland during 80 years.
Overall
Linking Words
, all the trends had a significant decline.
Use synonyms
Birth
Add an article
The birth
show examples
rate
Use synonyms
 had
a
Change the article
the
show examples
 highest
rate
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 the population growth
rate
Use synonyms
 got the opposite in 1940 Looking in more detail, the public growth
rate
Use synonyms
 was the lowest
rate
Use synonyms
 in 1940 approximately just under 1 %.
Then
Linking Words
, many women
birth
Use synonyms
 in 1940 at 2,5%
while
Linking Words
 the
ratio
Use synonyms
 of death had a level at 1,5%.
However
Linking Words
, in 1955 the
ratio
Use synonyms
 of fertility decreased gradually by
half
Add an article
a half
show examples
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
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,
while
Linking Words
fatality
Correct article usage
the fatality
show examples
rate
Use synonyms
 declined substantially
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 around 0,5
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
.
Additionally
Linking Words
, the population
dense
Replace the word
density
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 in Scotland increased
abd
Correct your spelling
and
 surpassed the fatality
rate
Use synonyms
about
Change preposition
of about
show examples
 1,2
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
. Demographic trends in 2000 looked different
due to
Linking Words
 lots of reduction in all variables.
For instance
Linking Words
, the
ratio
Use synonyms
 of
fertality
Correct your spelling
fertility
fatality
 dropped dramatically well under 1%,
whereas
Linking Words
 the mortality
rate
Use synonyms
Verb problem
apply
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was
Unnecessary verb
apply
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remained stable
Change preposition
at just
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just
Change preposition
at just
show examples
 under half
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 and the public dense
rate
Use synonyms
 went down to nearly 0%.
Linking Words
Last
Add a comma
Last,
show examples
 in 2020, the
ratio
Use synonyms
 of mortality exceeded the
ratio
Use synonyms
 of
birth
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by Dedeways244 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 69%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words birth, rate, ratio, percent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trends" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decline" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "just under" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • birth rate
  • death rate
  • population growth rate
  • percentage
  • fluctuation
  • trend
  • peak
  • decline
  • stabilize
  • demographic
  • interrelate
  • historical events
  • social policies
  • economic conditions
  • healthcare advancements
  • variable
  • measured
  • decade
  • significant
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