IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

You and some friends ate a meal at a restaurant to celebrate a special occasion, and you were very pleased with the food and service. Write a letter to the restaurant manager. In your letter give details of your visit to the restaurant explain the reason for the celebration say what was good about the food and the service

#friends #restaurant #occasion #food #service #manager #visit #reason #celebration
Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing
this
 letter to express my sense of well-being that I get really pleased with your service on
last
 week. Let me explain what happened.
Firstly
,
last
 weekend it was my best friend’s birthday and I had planned how to celebrate
this
 special event. I and my other mates wanted to give him a big surprise on his 17th birthday.
Then
, I was so worried, because I was not sure
to
Correct pronoun usage
I to
show examples
 make a good party night,
however
Add a comma
however,
show examples
 it was better than I wanted. When we
came
Verb problem
arrived
show examples
 there we
welcomed
Add a missing verb
were welcomed
show examples
 very well by the waitress, and they were
so
Rephrase
very
show examples
 friendly to us. On that day, we cut a cake and your employees played a happy birthday song for our close friend.
In addition
, we were
order
Wrong verb form
ordered
show examples
 so delicious meals too, and we danced in the dancing area. We had a great night and we were so happy. Thank you so much for all of that ! I want to say that I appreciate it. I will visit soon again. Yours faithfully, Samandar
Submitted by omondavlat91 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence and Cohesion
Use more complex sentence structures and vary your sentence beginnings to improve readability and coherence.
Task Achievement
To improve task achievement, ensure that your letter answers all parts of the prompt in detail. Include more specific examples about what made the food and service good.
Task Achievement
Consider using a more professional and consistent tone throughout your letter to match the context of writing to a restaurant manager.
Coherence and Cohesion
Divide your letter into clear paragraphs, each focusing on a single idea or part of the prompt for better logical structure and reader comprehension.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that the greeting and closing of your letter are appropriate for formal correspondence. 'Dear Sir or Madam,' is a good start, but ensure consistency in tone throughout the letter.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • outstanding
  • exquisite
  • impeccable
  • flawless
  • attentive
  • accommodating
  • courteous
  • prompt
  • delicious
  • mouthwatering
  • satisfying
  • memorable
  • thank
  • impressed
  • appreciate
  • grateful
  • recommend
  • celebration
  • occasional
  • special
  • occasion
  • stellar
  • exceptional
  • commend
  • commendable
What to do next:
Look at other essays: