IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

The pie charts below show the percentage of time working adults spent on different activities in a particular country in 1958 and 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The pie charts below show the percentage of time working adults spent on different activities in a particular country in 1958 and 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#show #percentage #time #adults #activities #country #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The pie charts compare the allocation of
time
 by working adults in a particular country
for
Change preposition
between
show examples
 1958 and 2008. It's evident that
work
time
 increased from 33% to 42%,
whereas
 sleep decreased from 32% to 25% over these years. Interestingly,
time
 spent on
leisure
 at home saw an upward trend, reflecting a change in relaxation preferences. In 1958,
work
 and sleep nearly dominated the chart equally, but by 2008,
work
time
 had surged.
This
 shift underscores an evolving
work
 culture prioritizing professional life.
Additionally
,
leisure
 activities at home increased from 8% to 12%, indicating a stronger inclination towards
home-centered
Change the spelling
home-centred
show examples
 relaxation.
Moreover
, the data reveal an uptick in travel from 2% to 8%, suggesting a growing interest in mobility or possibly more accessible travel options by 2008.
However
, going out experienced a significant reduction, plummeting from 19% to 6%, hinting at changing social habits or possibly the rise of digital entertainment options.
To conclude
, the fifty-year span shows a notable move towards more
work
, reduced sleep, increased home
leisure
, and a decline in outdoor social activities. These shifts mirror broader societal changes in
work
 demands, lifestyle choices, and possibly the impact of technological advancements on
leisure
 and social interaction.
Submitted by serginio.nick on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words time, work, leisure with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: