Some people think that men and women have different qualities, therefore certain jobs are suitable for men and others women. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, gender equality is becoming more spreadful day by day,
however
, there are some people argued that
men
and
women
have different qualities when there are certain jobs which are suitable for each gender.
This
writer support
this
statement and will show why in the latter essay. For the first reason, we need to start at the stone age, when
male
Add an article
a male
the male
show examples
in
this
era was the breadwinner of the family, going outside to hunt and
built
Wrong verb form
build
show examples
houses in the morning
while
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
picked up fruits and crafted things at home. Those roles led to the development in strength for
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
and flexibility for
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
,
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
means that
men
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
likely to do heavy
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
better than
women
while
women
can do creative
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
like weaving and drawing better than
men
. Another reason can be noticed is the important of female when they have responsibility to give birth to childs and the process of it is diffinitely terrible for them. If they
isn't
Change the verb form
aren't
show examples
careful , their child can
be died
Change to the active voice
die
show examples
so
thy
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
cannot do hard work during the period, making it more uncomfortable for
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
. In conclusion,
men
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
suitable to do hard work and
women
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
suitable to do creative work.
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introduction conclusion present
Ensure your introduction clearly states your position on the topic and briefly outlines your main points. The concluding paragraph should summarise your arguments concisely.
logical structure
Strive for better organisation of ideas. Use more cohesive devices such as linking words or phrases to ensure a smoother flow between sentences and paragraphs.
supported main points
Develop each point with more detailed examples or evidence. Ensure each body paragraph presents a clear main idea and uses specific examples to support your views.
complete response
Answer the question directly and fully, making your viewpoint clear. Expand your discussion to consider counter-arguments or different perspectives for a more rounded response.
clear comprehensive ideas
Be more precise and clear in conveying your ideas. Avoid overgeneralizations and back up your arguments with specific, relevant examples.
relevant specific examples
Incorporate more diverse and specific examples to support your arguments. This will make your essay more convincing and engaging.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • gender roles
  • inherent qualities
  • social dynamics
  • merit-based selection
  • advancements in technology
  • levelled the playing field
  • gender stereotypes
  • equal opportunities
  • physical differences
  • workplace
  • evolving
  • traditional view
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