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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The diagram below shows the development of cutting tools in the Stone Age. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram below shows the development of cutting tools in the Stone Age. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#development #tools #stone #age #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The diagram illustrates the development of cutting tools in the Stone Age between 1.4 million years ago and 0.8 million years ago. The figure shows how the period of the
Stong
Correct your spelling
Stone
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 Age.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that the Stone Age of
Tool
Use synonyms
 A and
Tool
Use synonyms
B
Use synonyms
 both difference changed over time. Looking at the figures, it can be seen that the structure in the front
view
Use synonyms
 of
tool
Use synonyms
 A is quite slim. Meanwhile, the features in the front
view
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 of
tool
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B
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 are quite larger than those in the front
view
Use synonyms
 of
tool
Use synonyms
 A.
In addition
Linking Words
, the side
view
Use synonyms
 of both tools A and
B
Use synonyms
 found that the side
view
Use synonyms
B
Use synonyms
has
Verb problem
was
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 slim when
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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compared with the side
view
Use synonyms
tool
Use synonyms
 A. Next to the back
view
Use synonyms
 found that the back
view
Use synonyms
 of
tool
Use synonyms
B
Use synonyms
has
Verb problem
is
show examples
 bigger
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
than
tool
Use synonyms
 A.
when
Capitalize word
When
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 comparing allow 5 cm.
Finally
Linking Words
, compared
about
Change preposition
apply
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the colours of both found that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tool
Use synonyms
 A a grey colours and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tool
Use synonyms
B
Use synonyms
a
Add a missing verb
is a
show examples
light grey colour.
Submitted by suchanya3105 on

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 86%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words tool, b, view with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Stone Age
  • tools
  • cutting
  • development
  • rudimentary
  • sophisticated
  • progression
  • unworked pebbles
  • flake tools
  • bifacial tools
  • efficiency
  • materials
  • emergence
  • characteristics
  • functionality
  • craftsmanship
  • precision
  • hunting
  • carving
  • advancements
  • significance
  • human development
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