The bar chart below shows the number of employed persons by job type and sex for Australia last year Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#bar #persons #job #type #sex #australia #year #summarise #information #features #comparisons

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The bar chart depicts information about employees by gender and kind of jobs, in

last

Linking Words

year, in Australia. There are seven categories divided by 2 sex: male and female.

Overall

Linking Words

, there are more

men

Use synonyms

than

women

Use synonyms

in all sectors of jobs, except clerical. The most common job for

men

Use synonyms

is tradespeople,

whereas

Linking Words

for

women

Use synonyms

is clerical. Professional jobs are the group where the difference by sex is lower,

while

Linking Words

the cluster where the difference is higher, is tradespeople. There are far more

men

Use synonyms

in management and production roles. Despite in the clerical sector

women

Use synonyms

are the majority, almost 1 million, the number of employed people in

this

Linking Words

sector is the second most often among

men

Use synonyms

(900,000). The categories where

men

Use synonyms

are less frequent are labourers (400.00) and semi-professionals (500.000). Among

women

Use synonyms

, tradespeople (100,00) and production (100,00) presented the same amount and both sectors are the least common.

Overall

Linking Words

, there are more male people working than female people, in absolute numbers.

Submitted by fmulato on Sun Feb 25 2024

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".

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Vocabulary: Replace the words men, women with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "difference" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

160 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Employment figures
Sectors
Significant disparities
Gender balance
Skewed
Trends
Patterns
Dominant
Inferred
Labor market
Year-on-year comparison
Insights
Implications

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The bar chart below shows the number of employed persons by job type and sex for Australia last year Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Nowadays, more people are choosing to socialise online rather than face to face. Is this a positive or a negative development?

The role of prisons should be to punish criminals who have committed serious crimes. Training courses and education offered to prisoners are a waste of tax payers' money. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that success is about hard work and determination. Others think that success has a connection with money and personal appearance. Discuss both these views and give your opinion. (Steve no copyright)

Some people argue that all experimentation on animals is bad and should be outlawed. However, others believe that important scientific discoveries can be made from animal experiments. Can experimentation on animals be justified? Are there any alternatives?

Some people think that children should aim to be the best at what they are doing while others believe it is not necessary for them. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.