some people think that the individuals are responsible for their own health but other argue it is the government's responsibility. discuss both views and give an opinion
Some individuals state that one's
health
condition is their own responsibility, taking measures to prevent illness and improve their well-being. Others argue that the ministry plays a major role and should make sure that the citizens are healthy. In this
essay, I will discuss both viewspoints
and give my opinion.
It is believed that everyone is responsible for their fitness, which I completely agree with. Especially, nowadays when there is so much information about eating healthy, losing weight, better sleep, and so on. The point is that even though the information is accessible and public to everyone, not everyone takes action to improve their lifestyle and habits. Correct your spelling
viewpoints
This
leads to a point that people have free will and it is completely up to them in what lifestyle to engage in. If one is curious and has the discipline and motivation to better their health
and well-being, it is in their hands.
Another perspective is that the authority is responsible for the individual's health
and I think, it is a great argument because the healthcare system is as important as one's daily habits. Therefore
, the government should make sure that healthcare services are available and affordable to the general public so that it does not turn into a luxury but a basic human right. Even, laws on banning electronic cigarettes or increasing the price help with the prevention of increasing nu,ber
Correct your spelling
number
os
smokers.
In conclusion, the perfect solution would be the combination of both, the individual's effort and the government's support in healthcare by providing a great system and accessible infrastructure. Correct your spelling
of
However
, in the end, it is up to an individual to make use of these benefits and improve their health
or just ignore them.Submitted by asllchkied on
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introduction conclusion present
Develop a more detailed introduction and conclusion. The introduction should more clearly outline your argument, and the conclusion should summarise your points more firmly and clearly express your opinion.
logical structure
Organise your ideas more logically and ensure that your essay flows smoothly from one point to the next. Consider using more linking words or phrases to help improve your essay's cohesion.
supported main points
Support your main points with more specific examples and evidence. This helps to make your arguments more convincing and gives your essay more depth.
complete response
Fully address the task by discussing both viewpoints thoroughly before giving your own opinion. Make sure your essay explicitly addresses all parts of the prompt.
clear comprehensive ideas
Clarify and expand upon your ideas to allow for a more comprehensive understanding. Each paragraph should fully explore the concept it introduces.
relevant specific examples
Incorporate more relevant and specific examples to support your views. This strengthens your arguments and makes your essay more engaging.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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