In some places the old age is valued, while in other cultures youth is considered more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

this

21st century, there is a clear hierarchy between the age of the old and the young. The writer contends that it is vital to invest in the improvement of the younger generations rather than considering estimating the old

people

's values. It must be recognised that the globe is developing day by day with the assistance of technology and artificial information.

That is

the reason why the younger generations are more valuable

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

because young

people

can have the ability to practise and

utilised

Wrong verb form

utilise

show examples

devices flexibly and their degrees and certificates

are seemed

Change to the active voice

seem

have seemed

show examples

to be crucial and worthy.

Moreover

, the youth is educated at an early age in schools and their mindset always requires ambition, the best try,

the

Correct word choice

and the

show examples

opportunity to learn and challenge themselves.

As a result

, those

people

can be promoted in their careers easily and they may

also

get some scholarships to develop work in foreign countries.

Therefore

, the government should concentrate on the youth and facilitate

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

them to cultivate and explore

about

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the world.

However

, the old still bring benefits for life. It should be acknowledged that elder

people

are rich in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

wisdom and experience because they have tackled many different situations, which lead to flexibility the agility in problem-solving and

give

Correct subject-verb agreement

gives

show examples

children useful advice.

This

point may be true, but old individuals cannot quickly respond and use technological devices masterfully. Taking IT jobs as an example, social demands make

people

know how to control AI and gadgets. We can see that the young

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

chosen more than the old by recruiting who actually manages the machines. In conclusion,

although

I realise the potential of the old in experience, I would argue that the young should be respected

due to

their vast amount of knowledge and professionalism in technology.

Mon Feb 26 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

logical structure

Ensure that your essay has a clear and logical structure throughout. This includes having distinct paragraphs, each addressing a specific point related to the question. Developing a more cohesive argument where each part flows smoothly into the next will strengthen your essay.

introduction conclusion present

Your introduction and conclusion are present but can be improved for clarity. Specifically, make your thesis statement in the introduction clearer and ensure your conclusion effectively summarizes your argument and restates your opinion.

supported main points

Support your arguments with more detailed and specific examples. These examples should clearly relate to the point you are making in each paragraph. Consider using a wider range of examples that include statistics, real-life situations, and authoritative opinions to enhance your argument.

complete response

While you have addressed the prompt, your response could be strengthened by providing a more balanced view of both perspectives before stating your opinion. Ensure you fully explore each view and how they compare before presenting your opinion.

clear comprehensive ideas

Focus on clarifying and developing your ideas further. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea that is explained, supported, and concluded effectively. Avoid making broad, unsupported statements.

relevant specific examples

Integrate more relevant and specific examples to support your arguments. These should not only illustrate your point but also be directly tied to the argument you are making, adding depth and credibility to your discussion.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

295 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

repositories of knowledge
esteemed
insights
embedded
seeking advice
prioritizing
premium on innovation
dynamism
adaptability
technological advancements
entrepreneurs
pioneers
indispensable
stability
harmonious
progressive

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5.5
band
Today more and more tourist are visiting places where conditions difficult such as sahara deseret or the antartic .what are the benefits and disadvantages for tourist who visit such places?
Nowadays, many visitors are opting for excursion in harsh and mobile places like deserets and extremely cold areas like the Antartic. This trend has many pros as well as cons and this essay will try to delve into both the aspects.
5.5
band
In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Infrastructure is the backbone of every country's economy, and public transport is one of it. In some countries, populace prefer to have a faster railways transport so they can commute easily between cities whereas, some are in favour of just improving the exiting one. In this essay, I will discuss bith sides and give reasons for my opinion which is spending more capital on the current public transport.
8
band
For a long time art has been considered an essential part of all cultures in the world. However, nowadays people’s values have changed, and we tend to consider science, technology and business more important than arts. What do you think are the causes of this? What can be done to draw people’s attention to art?
Nowadays, throughout the world technological progress sharply changed people’s lives by providing lots of information through up-to-date electronic devices. As a matter of fact, it is obvious that this contemporary trend negatively affects another vital sector of activity as an art direction, rapidly increasing the percentage of societies’ involvement in this circle. This essay will attempt to illustrate the main reasons for this situation and will provide a few viewpoints on how it can be resolved.
4.5
band
Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that ti is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Nowadays, after starting studies University education, students shall spend time in their job. From my perspective, I disagree with that ideas and will show the reasons why
6.5
band
Should private schools receive government funding? Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
It is a basically welcome idea that every educational institution requires proper funding for its operational activity. It is usually wondered if private institutions are entitled to grants from governmental bodies: Nevertheless, this discourse seeks to accomplish the set primary objective of proffering my thoughts and reasons regarding whether private institutions should be allocated grants from the government.

In some places the old age is valued, while in other cultures youth is considered more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Your opinion

Today more and more tourist are visiting places where conditions difficult such as sahara deseret or the antartic .what are the benefits and disadvantages for tourist who visit such places?

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that ti is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Should private schools receive government funding? Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.