The bar and line chart below shows average monthly temperatures and bathing suit sales in New York for the first 6 months of 2012. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#bar #line #temperatures #suit #sales #york #first #months #summarise #information #features #comparisons

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The bar and line graphs provide data concerning the revenue of bathing

suits sale

Fix the agreement mistake

suit sales

show examples

and the average

temperature

Use synonyms

of the first semester of 2012 in New York City, respectively.

Overall

Linking Words

, the majority

sales

Change preposition

of sales

show examples

happened in April when the weather was mild and the

temperature

Use synonyms

had

constant

Correct article usage

a constant

show examples

increase during the period. The

temperature

Use synonyms

line started in January

around

Change preposition

at around

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thirteen degrees and stayed steady until February when it presented

constant

Add an article

a constant

show examples

increase of almost ten

degreens

Correct your spelling

degrees

per month until summer in the following period,

whereas

Linking Words

bath suits

sale

Fix the agreement mistake

sales

show examples

rose US$ 500.000 in the first three months. The majority

sales

Change preposition

of sales

show examples

occurred,

however

Linking Words

in April, when the weather was mild around fifty degrees,

achieving

Verb problem

apply

show examples

almost US$ 300.000 of bathing clothes sold.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, when the

temperature

Use synonyms

was hotter, achieving 60F and 70F in May and June, respectively, the sales had a steep drop in the numbers, presenting an average of US$80.000 in the former and less than US$ 40.000 in the latter month.

Submitted by carinabmurakami on Mon Feb 26 2024

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words temperature with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.

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4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

160 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

average monthly temperatures
bathing suit sales
correlation
monthly breakdown
significant changes
warmest months
speculate
trends
increase in temperature
contrasting
predictive speculation
general trends
specific months

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The bar and line chart below shows average monthly temperatures and bathing suit sales in New York for the first 6 months of 2012. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Many people believe that international tourism is a bad thing for their country. What are the reasons behind this view? What are the solutions to change it?

Some people think that the government is responsible for the rise in obesity in children. Other people think that it is a fault of the parents. Discuss both side and give your opinion

Many people go through life doing work that they hate or have no talent for. Why does this happen? What are the consequences of this situation? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Since the 18th century technological advances have replaced people in the workplace. With today’s technology this process is happening at a greater rate. Technology is increasingly responsible for unemployment. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

You recently sent some documents by post, but they did not arrive. Write a letter to the post manager. In your letter Give details of the situation Describe the documents Say what action you want the post office to take.