IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

You recently spent a night in a hotel and had to put up with a great deal of noise very early in the morning because of a fairly central heating system. The manager promised contact you regarding compensation but you still heard from him. Write a letter to the hotel in the letter. Describe the problem at the hotel. Explain what the manager had said at the time. Say what you wanted the manager to do

#night #hotel #noise #system #manager #contact #compensation #time
Dear Mr John, The reason why I am addressing you is that,
also
 I think there are a lot of problems
your
Change preposition
with your
show examples
hotel
. I hope you
is
Verb problem
will
show examples
 solve
this
issues
Fix the agreement mistake
issue
show examples
 in the near future. My name is Tom. In my opinion,
this
hotel
extremely
Add a missing verb
is extremely
show examples
 uncomfortable for humans because there are many problems at a
hotel
.
For example
,
this
issues
Verb problem
apply
show examples
many rooms do space
heater
Fix the agreement mistake
heaters
show examples
, swimming
pool
Fix the agreement mistake
pools
show examples
 and
playground
Fix the agreement mistake
playgrounds
show examples
 for
hotel
 members.
Besides
 that, I think there are very small in the room at
hotel
Add an article
the hotel
a hotel
show examples
.
Furthermore
, many people, come on every time to guest
hotel
. So, I think
your
Replace the word
you're
you are
show examples
 a
hotel
 should every time open for some humans.
Such
 as, I come
22:00
Change preposition
at 22,00
show examples
 p.m. from work every night. From one perspective,
this
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
hotel
 should be
extremely
Correct article usage
an extremely
show examples
 large room swimming pool and playground for a lot of kids and
also
 many people visit your
hotel
. I want
this items
Change the determiner
this item
these items
show examples
 for humans and for me. I am looking forward to your answer in the near future. Yours sincerely, Tom Smith.
Submitted by soglomovsarvar on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Make sure to clearly state your purpose in the opening paragraph for better coherence. E.g., 'I am writing to express my dissatisfaction due to...'
coherence cohesion
Organize your letter into clear paragraphs: introduction, description of the issue, what was promised by the manager, and your expectations or requests.
coherence cohesion
Use formal language for complaints and request compensation in a polite manner. Avoid slang and overly simplistic expressions.
task achievement
Make sure your letter directly addresses the task's three points: describing the problem, explaining what the manager said, and stating what you expect as a resolution.
task achievement
To improve your letter, include specific details about the problem (the noise from the heating system) and mention the promise made by the manager for better task achievement.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: