IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

It has become very common for people to borrow money. Most people have a Credit Card, a mortgage and often they will buy a car on credit as well. Is this a good idea is it too risky? Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The trend of borrowing from
Use synonyms
bank
Fix the agreement mistake
banks
show examples
getting
Verb problem
is
show examples
increase
Wrong verb form
increasing
show examples
.
Majority
Correct article usage
The majority
show examples
 of
people
Use synonyms
 borrow
credit
Use synonyms
 to
Use synonyms
payoff
Correct your spelling
pay off
show examples
 their mortgage and car loan. Some
people
Use synonyms
 believe
its
Correct your spelling
it's
show examples
 good think as they
us
Correct your spelling
use
show examples
credit
Use synonyms
money
Use synonyms
 to generate more
money
Use synonyms
However
Linking Words
, I believe, the fact cannot be neglected that it
cause
Change the verb form
causes
show examples
mentally
Change the adverb
mental
show examples
 pressure and more chance of
fraudulant
Correct your spelling
fraudulent
 activities. No doubt, the borrowings available from
Use synonyms
bank
Fix the agreement mistake
banks
show examples
 in the form of
card
Fix the agreement mistake
cards
show examples
 are made
way
Correct article usage
a way
show examples
 to
Use synonyms
payoff
Correct your spelling
pay
show examples
 regular
bills
Use synonyms
.
People
Use synonyms
 feel they have more
money
Use synonyms
Linking Words
then
Correct your spelling
than
show examples
 their
bank
Use synonyms
 balance which cannot be stolen and
handy
Add a missing verb
is handy
show examples
 to
Use synonyms
payoff
Correct your spelling
pay
show examples
 the
bills
Use synonyms
, large payments can be
done
Verb problem
made
show examples
 through
such
Linking Words
 plastic cards without carrying cash in hand. Apart from that,
credit
Use synonyms
money
Use synonyms
 from banks can be invested to
generated
Change the form of the verb
generate
show examples
 more
money
Use synonyms
for instance
Linking Words
 In some countries
people
Use synonyms
do investment
Wrong verb form
invest
show examples
 in stocks through
credit
Use synonyms
card
Fix the agreement mistake
cards
show examples
 and generate instant profit which would be used to
Linking Words
further
Verb problem
pay
show examples
payoff
Use synonyms
credit
Use synonyms
 card
bills
Use synonyms
.
Although
Linking Words
people
Use synonyms
 need to pay interest on
credit
Use synonyms
transaction
Fix the agreement mistake
transactions
show examples
 still, it is
popular
Add an article
a popular
the popular
show examples
 choice
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
public
Add an article
the public
show examples
.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the fact of
mentally
Change the adverb
mental
show examples
 pressure cannot be denied which comes from the trap of
credit
Use synonyms
 payments. If someone, is
fail
Replace the word
fails
show examples
 to
Use synonyms
payoff
Correct your spelling
pay
show examples
EMI
Correct article usage
the EMI
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
credit
Correct article usage
the credit
show examples
 statement on time it charges
compouded
Correct your spelling
compounded
compound
 interest of everyday to
cardholder
Correct article usage
the cardholder
show examples
 which becomes
huge
Correct article usage
a huge
show examples
 amount from small borrowing. If it doesn't get
Use synonyms
payoff
Correct article usage
a payoff
show examples
Linking Words
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the end it leads
Change preposition
to a
show examples
a lots
Correct the article-noun agreement
a lot
lots
show examples
 of mental pressure and in some cases person ends
at
Change preposition
up
show examples
bankrupcy
Correct your spelling
bankrupt
. It is important to use wise strategy
while
Linking Words
 using
such
Linking Words
credit
Use synonyms
 transactions.
Also
Linking Words
,
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
 the increase of technology fraud activities
are
Verb problem
have
show examples
 become more popular in
such
Linking Words
credit
Use synonyms
operated
Correct your spelling
credit-operated
show examples
 society. Scammers only need
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
 digits of OTP to vanish
whole
Change the article
the whole
show examples
 amount from
Correct article usage
the cardholder
show examples
cardholder
Change noun form
cardholder's
show examples
aacount
Correct your spelling
account
accounts
 which
further
Linking Words
impact
Correct subject-verb agreement
impacts
show examples
 their
credit
Use synonyms
 score
also
Linking Words
 less chance of,
to retrieve
Change the verb form
retrieving
show examples
money
Use synonyms
 back.
For instance
Linking Words
, in India high number of scams
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
happened
due to
Linking Words
unawareness
Correct article usage
the unawareness
show examples
 of
cardholder
Fix the agreement mistake
cardholders
show examples
 who share their transaction OTP
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
scammer
Add an article
the scammer
a scammer
show examples
 on call which leads to
large
Change the article
a large
show examples
amount
Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
show examples
 of debt on
person
Add an article
the person
a person
show examples
. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
credit
Use synonyms
 borrowings are helpful for
Use synonyms
payoff
Correct your spelling
paying
show examples
 instant
bills
Use synonyms
 and
generate
Wrong verb form
generating
show examples
 more
money
Use synonyms
 from investment,
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
show examples
if the statement balance
does
Verb problem
is
show examples
 not clear on time it leads to high debt and has more chance of being
trap
Wrong verb form
trapped
show examples
 in
fruad
Correct your spelling
fraud
. I believe
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
credit
Use synonyms
 should be used by following
strategy
Correct article usage
a strategy
show examples
 way of how to do
credit
Use synonyms
 payments on time to
Use synonyms
bank
Add an article
the bank
show examples
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

organization
Introduction and conclusion: Develop a clear and purposeful introduction that gives an overview of what will be discussed. Similarly, a conclusion should summarise your main points and clearly state your opinion.
organization
Paragraphing: Organise your essay into clear paragraphs. Each paragraph should address a single main idea, supported by examples or further explanation.
cohesion
Linking words and transitions: Use linking words and transitions between sentences and paragraphs to help your essay flow more naturally.
task response
Addressing the prompt: Ensure that you directly address all parts of the prompt in your essay. This includes discussing both views thoroughly and providing a clear, well-supported opinion.
content
Specific examples and detailed explanation: Incorporate more specific examples and detailed explanations to support your points. This helps in making your essay more persuasive and your arguments more convincing.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • compelled
  • strategic financial decision
  • investing
  • property
  • cash flow
  • rewards programs
  • debt trap
  • servicing debt
  • exacerbate
  • financial strain
  • cycle of debt
  • personal responsibility
  • financial literacy
  • informed decisions
  • excessive borrowing
  • ill-informed borrowing
  • financial planning
What to do next:
Look at other essays: