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Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

The table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#information #police #budget #area #britain #money #show #summarise #features #comparisons
The given figures illustrate the sources of income and the relative allocation of
Britians´
Correct your spelling
Britain´
 police budget in 2017 and 2018 separately.
Overall
, the national revenue
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
mainly
came
Wrong verb form
comes
show examples
 from
national
Correct article usage
the national
show examples
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
governments
, local taxes and other sources eg.
grants
Change preposition
of grants
show examples
.
On the other
hand
Add a comma
hand,
show examples
 the
fond
Correct your spelling
fund
show examples
 was spent
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the payment of wages for officers and staff, technology development and buildings and transport construction. As can be seen, the main payment was poured into the salary
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
 staff. Upon initial observation, the total amount of national income increased
almost
Change preposition
by almost
show examples
 13.9
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 achieving 318.6 million in 2018 compared with the
last
Correct word choice
previous
show examples
 year. The most significant is local taxes,
arise
Verb problem
rising
show examples
 to 102.3 from 91.2 million in 2017,
meanwhile
Add a comma
meanwhile,
show examples
 the
remain
Change the form of the verb
remaining
show examples
 two categories go through slight changes. In terms of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
spending, the investment in building and transport disposed of the same share in both mentioned years.
conversely
, the technology item doubled its proportion to 14%
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the total amount of investment, replacing the previous one as the second main expenditure in 2018.
Submitted by futaommy on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Fiscal allocations
  • Revenue streams
  • Budgetary oversight
  • Expenditure
  • Financial appropriation
  • Government grants
  • Local taxation
  • Operational costs
  • Capital investment
  • Public safety
  • Crime prevention
  • Community policing
  • Resource allocation
  • Year-on-year comparison
  • Budgetary constraints
  • Fiscal year
  • Fund disbursement
  • Budget deficit/surplus
  • Trend analysis
  • Financial sustainability
  • Law enforcement funding
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