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Band 5

some university students want to learn about other subjects in additioon to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#university #students #subjects #additioon #time #attention #qualification
This
 question
whether
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of whether
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 colleges should put unrelated
cousres
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courses
 in
pupils
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pupils'
pupil's
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schedule
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schedules
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 or not is a contentious one.
Although
 there would be precious
cousre
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course
 among those subjects, I believe it has its own drawbacks, either. Looking at the
darkside
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dark side
 of
this
 proposal,
first,
a majority of students pay considerable
tution
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tuition
 fees to obtain what they have already enrolled on;
thus
, it could be disappointing for them if they do not gain it.
Moreover
, there are numerous miscellaneous institutes
would
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that would
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 accomplish
if
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it
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 for those who are both intended and
voluntear
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volunteer
.
For instance
; museums are
helding
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holding
 some workshops surrounding history,
archeological
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archaeological
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 matters and ancient artefacts;
therefore
, if someone inclines to know about them, she or he will participate in them.
Last
 but not least, university attendants passed unrelated subjects in the high schools or primary schools before, so
for
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apply
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there is no need to recall or expand them any longer.
On the other hand
, the beneficial aspects of the
talkig
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talking
 point
is
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are
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nothworthy
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noteworthy
, with providing
anew
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a new
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 chance for trainees to know what their real aim and
ambitios
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ambition
ambitious
ambitions
is
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are
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, by minding them, the arena of science is wide enough to explore
to explore
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apply
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in
other
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another
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 side of it.
Furthermore
, sometimes individuals find a viewpoint that can have
impact
Add an article
an impact
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 on their main subject by which they
they
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apply
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would be able to make
connection
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connections
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 with other students to solve a crucial problem. what is more, it is expected from an
accademy
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academy
 attendant to at least
has
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have
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 not only an acceptable amount of
specilised
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specialised
specialized
 knowledge but
also
 a great deal of general information and awareness regarding
the
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apply
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society.
To conclude
, even though the benefits of
additional
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the additional
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subject
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subjects
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seems
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seem
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 appealing, it is not
defenitely
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definitely
 students
looking
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look
show examples
 forward
.
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to.
show examples
Submitted by amirhossein7179 on

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Coherence & Cohesion
Focus on structuring your essay more systematically. Begin with a clear introduction, present arguments for both views in separate paragraphs, and conclude with a summary of your own opinion.
Task Achievement
Develop your ideas more fully with specific examples. This strengthens your argument and makes your essay more persuasive.
Accuracy
Work on your spelling and grammar. This will not only help clarify your points but also make your writing more professional and easier to understand.
Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure your conclusion is clear and restates your opinion while summarizing the main points of your argument.
Lexical Resource
Expand your vocabulary related to the topic. Using a range of vocabulary demonstrates your language proficiency and helps engage your reader.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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