A good friend has just changed schools and is having difficulty fitting in and needs your advice. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter • make suggestions as to how they could make friends • suggest joining clubs, participating in school activities • give any extra general advice

#friend #schools #difficulty #advice #suggestions #friends #clubs #school #activities

Dear Manoj, How are you? It's been a month since I saw you. I just read your letter about your inconvenience at the new school. Well, try to speak to other students in the class. As you are very attractive and intelligent, everyone will make you their friend. Try to tell them some of the stories you are used to tell me. I'm sure everybody will like them.

Furthermore

, I have heard a lot about your school. I'd suggest you join some clubs and

also

participate in sports activities. I know you are a very good player in badminton, I'm sure you will have a good time by joining these clubs.

In addition

, why don't you spend some time reading books? trust me

this

will help you a lot because whenever I feel depressed and alone I will read some books to come out of it. Convey my best wishes to your parents. I'm looking forward to meeting you. Best Regards, Srinivas Varma.

Submitted by varmaib1 on Sun Mar 03 2024

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task achievement

Keep the introduction concise and to the point. While it's good to ask the recipient how they are, try to be more direct with the purpose of your letter.

coherence cohesion

Use a variety of linking words to connect your ideas better and make your writing more cohesive. Words and phrases like 'Furthermore,' 'In addition,' and 'Also,' can be used more strategically to guide the reader through your suggestions.

task achievement

Although you have shared personal stories and advice, consider adding more detail about how your friend can approach these activities or integrate into the new environment. Provide specific strategies or examples to make your suggestions more actionable.

coherence cohesion

Your closing is well-done, providing a warm ending to your letter. To enhance, you could also include a line looking forward to hearing back from your friend or encouraging them to share their progress.

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

7 paragraphs

163 words

8.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5

7.5

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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A good friend has just changed schools and is having difficulty fitting in and needs your advice. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter • make suggestions as to how they could make friends • suggest joining clubs, participating in school activities • give any extra general advice

Scientists tell us some activities are good for health and others are bad. Despite knowing that millions of people continue doing unhealthy activities. What are the causes and what are the solutions?

1.Very year an increasing number of people suffer from fast food related diseases. The government, therefore, should impose a high tax on fast food. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that all teenagers should be required to do unpaid work in their free time to help the local community. They believe this would benefit both the individual teenager and society as a whole. Do you agree or disagree?

nowadays many countries have very cosmopolitan cities with people from all over the world. How can the goverment ensure that all these people can live together harmoniously?