IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The pie chart below shows the main reasons why agricultural land becomes less productive. The table shows how these causes affected three regions of the world during the 1990s. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

The pie chart below shows the main reasons why agricultural land becomes less productive. The table shows how these causes affected three regions of the world during the 1990s. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
#land #three #regions #world #summarise #information #features #comparisons
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The given pie chart illustrates key facts behind the
less
Fix the agreement mistake
low
show examples
productiveness
Replace the word
productivity
show examples
 of farm
lands
Fix the agreement mistake
land
show examples
 and the table describes the the way, how above
reasons
Use synonyms
 affected three areas of the globe in
1990s
Change the article
the 1990s
show examples
 .
Overall
Linking Words
, deforestation , over-cultivation and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
over-grazing are the main
reasons
Use synonyms
 for the plantable
land
Use synonyms
 reduction.
However
Linking Words
,
according to
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 data Europe has
mostly
Add a missing verb
been mostly
show examples
 affected
from
Change preposition
by
show examples
 the above
reasons
Use synonyms
 compared to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
North America and Oceania. In detail,
Over
Change preposition
apply
show examples
 gazing is the main reason for the cultivativation
land
Use synonyms
 demolition with a recorded 35% valve.
However
Linking Words
,
over cultivation
Add a hyphen
over-cultivation
show examples
 and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
deforestation
also
Linking Words
 goes with near taly with 28% and 30% to the
over grazing
Correct your spelling
overgrazing
show examples
.
Where as
Correct your spelling
Whereas
show examples
 other
reasons
Use synonyms
responsible
Add a missing verb
are responsible
show examples
 for a minor fraction with
Correct article usage
a ploted
show examples
ploted
Correct your spelling
plotted
 7% valve . North America , reveals the least amount of degradation of the
land
Use synonyms
 compared to the other two regions ,with only 5%
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
total
Add an article
the total
show examples
land
Use synonyms
 area.
Although
Linking Words
, in
Oceania
Add a comma
Oceania,
show examples
 total
land
Use synonyms
 degradation is 13% ,
over cultivation
Add a hyphen
over-cultivation
show examples
 seems not a causative factor for it as
its
Correct your spelling
it is
show examples
 0 % in
recorded
Add an article
the recorded
show examples
 valve.
Submitted by dinaka0001 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
▼
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words reasons, land with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Pie chart
  • Table
  • Main features
  • Comparisons
  • Decreasing productivity
  • Reasons
  • Regional variations
  • Data
  • Summarize
What to do next:
Look at other essays: