You recently received a letter from a friend asking for your advice on whether to go to college or try to get a job. You think he/she should get a job. Write a letter to this friend. In my letter: •Say why he/she will not enjoy going to college •Explain why getting a job is a good idea •Suggest the type of job that would be suitable

#friend #advice #college #job #•say #•explain #idea #•suggest #type

Dear Gulsanam I

recieved

Correct your spelling

received

your letter. I am fine and I hope you doing great. Nice to hear from you after

such

a long time. I appreciate that you are asking my opinion on deciding whether going to college is best for you or getting a job and I am writing to tell you why. First of

all

Add a comma

all,

show examples

we have known each other since we were 9 years old. I know your character and

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

. You don't need to spend your time

Change preposition

show examples

college. The best way to achieve your dreams is to get a job. I know you well you are an active girl. You can not just sit in theoretical classes take notes memorize them and pass exams. You like to experience them actively and freely.

Furthermore

Add a comma

Furthermore,

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you just told me that you want to leave your

parents

Change noun form

parent's

parents'

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house and live a life that you want in freedom. So it is the best time to work and profit. The

last

thing I think you should work in music. Because since I

known

Add the auxiliary verb

knew

have known

show examples

you had a talent for singing. You're voice is

angel

Add an article

an angel

show examples

. Whenever

music

Correct article usage

the music

show examples

lesson started you sang more than two

music's

Change noun form

songs

show examples

it made me happy, when I heard you're voice tones. That's why you should teach singing to students who are interested in singing songs,

while

also

having a part-time job as a singer in restaurants or bars. I hope my suggestion

would

Wrong verb form

will

show examples

help you decide what is best for you. Yours sincerely Pokiza

Submitted by omondavlat91 on Tue Mar 05 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure your argument is clearly structured, dividing it into paragraphs that each discuss a single aspect of your advice. Transition sentences can improve the flow between paragraphs.

coherence cohesion

Your greeting and closing are appropriately formal which is good. However, try to use a consistent formal tone throughout the letter for better effect.

task achievement

Address all parts of the task effectively. Include more specific advice and examples to support your points, ensuring a complete response to your friend's query.

task achievement

Adopt a formal tone suitable for a letter. Avoid overly casual language and ensure your advice feels professional and thoughtful.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

247 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think the best way to solve trafic congestion in cities is to provide free public transport 24 hour a day, 7 days a week. Is it good or bad, to what extent do you agree or disagree.

In many societies, there is a growing emphasis on individualism, with people prioritizing their personal goals and desires over collective interests. Is this a positive or negative development?

Cramming and immersion are becomingly increasingly recognised methods of gaining knowledge in an area, other people disagree and say that only through lifelong learning can a subject be learnt. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Use specific reasons and examples to support your position.

More and more people want to buy famous brands of clothes, cars and other items. What are the reasons? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

In many countries, traditional dress and costumes are considered effective ways of maintaining links with the past. How effective can traditional costumes be, in this sense? What other ways exist to help citizens connect with a country’s past?