IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Opinion With internet improvements, people can leave views or opinions on certain goods or services that they have purchased. Is it a positive or negative development?

#internet #improvements #people #goods #services #development
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Nowadays, with the new developments, individuals can leave their comments or
opinions
 on certain products or services that they have bought. There might be some drawbacks
of
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to
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this
 phenomenon,
however
,
This
 essay firmly believes that
this
 could benefit people, because of the
feedbacks
Fix the agreement mistake
feedback
show examples
 that
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 essential in the diffusion of
companies
' reputation, and the truth about quality which can save many
customers
 from being deceived.
To begin
, today many
vievers
Correct your spelling
viewers
 of social media are posting different comments expressing their verdict upon certain
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
show examples
. With the improvements of new
technologies
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technologies,
show examples
 it became possible to clearly share
experience
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experiences
show examples
 with others just within a fraction of a second. And, many
companies
 could easily benefit from these correlations.
This
 is because
,
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apply
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 one of the main factors that amplifies the chance to spread
companies'
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a company's
show examples
 reputation is
a
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apply
show examples
feedback. Feedback plays a huge role in the
customers
' selections and could easily navigate them to whether
obtain
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to obtain
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 or discard
comodities
Correct your spelling
commodities
.
Consequently
,
companies
 with
most
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the most
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 favourable votes and
feedbacks
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feedback
show examples
 might become dominant in
long term
Add a hyphen
long-term
show examples
 contests.
For instance
, Apple company before gaining
a
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apply
show examples
superiority in the field of technology
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
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initialy
Correct your spelling
initially
 based its work
in
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on
show examples
 collecting
feedbacks
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feedback
show examples
 manifesting
customers
' gratification.
On the other hand
,
views
Correct article usage
the views
show examples
 and
opinions
 of people may save millions of individuals from being deceived.
This
 is because
,
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apply
show examples
 every platform in social
network
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networks
show examples
 has its own statistics and total rates of
feedbacks
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feedback
show examples
 that appear on screens right before ordering or acquiring a specific product. And, they may serve as a great precaution for many humans owing to the fact that goods
in
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on
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internet
Add an article
the internet
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 could contain misleading
informations
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information
pieces of information
show examples
 on the account of quality and availability.
That is
 why, personal
opinions
 of people could prevent
such
 obscure consequences. To
enumurate
Correct your spelling
enumerate
, the app called Play Market offers a great majority of products
,
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apply
show examples
 and has a special line full of
feedbacks
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feedback
show examples
 that could help many users to buy reliable and
high
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highly
show examples
 verified goods. In conclusion, with technological advancements individuals can publish their personal views and
opinions
.
This
 may be a negative development in some cases,
however
,
This
 essay trusts that there are more positive traits, because of the importance of
feedbacks
 that help to spread
companies
' reputation and, revelation of truth that can save many
customers
 from being deceived.
Submitted by ruznadir on

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task achievement
Be sure to cover both sides of the argument more evenly to provide a balanced view. This essay leans heavily towards the positive aspects without adequately exploring the potential negatives.
task achievement
Incorporate more concrete examples to substantiate your points. General statements are made without providing specific, illustrative examples to strengthen your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure your essay has a clear logical structure by consistently using transitional phrases to connect ideas and paragraphs, enhancing the overall flow.
coherence and cohesion
To improve coherence, make sure each paragraph centralizes around a single idea, supported by examples or further explanation. Avoid overly broad statements.
coherence and cohesion
Revise the introduction and conclusion to more clearly state your thesis and summarize your argument, respectively, ensuring they serve their purposes more effectively.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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