the grap below shows in percentage terms the changing patterns of domestic access to modern technology in homes in the UK summerise the informatio by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons were relavant.

#grap #percentage #terms #patterns #access #technology #homes #uk #summerise #informatio #features #comparisons #relavant

The given line graph illustrates the variation

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show examples

domestic access to

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players, mobile phones,

home

computers and

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the internet

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internet

Capitalize word

Internet

show examples

Correct your spelling

homes in percentage terms from 1996 to 2003.

Overall

althogh

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although

CD players were the highest

home

acessed

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access

modern device

through out

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throughout

show examples

the given period , mobile phones recorded the greatest increase in

home

access during the same

tme

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time

. Other than that internet access had been appeared later in the UK domestic market ,

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apply

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compared to the other three devices. In detail, in

the

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apply

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1996/97

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players were the highest accessed modern device for domestic usage in

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the UK

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with posted 60% valve, and it

had risen

Wrong verb form

rose

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gradually to record a valve slightly above 80% in 2002/03.

Similarly

home

computers were recorded near 30% in 1996/97 and just above 50% in 2002/03 following the same trend , internet

acess

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access

also

followed the same pattern but it was commenced in 1998/99.

On the contrary

, Mobile phones had been

their

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there

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in the domestic market

just

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at just

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below 20% in 1996/97 and it increased noticeably

untill

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until

1998/99 ,and

therafter

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thereafter

, it climbed up significantly to approximately 45% ,and had risen slightly to achieve a valve just below 50% in 2000/01.

Afterward

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Afterwards

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, during the first half of

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the next

show examples

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the next

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two

years

Add a comma

years,

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had gone

Wrong verb form

went

show examples

up remarkably and

then

slowly

Verb problem

apply

show examples

achive

Correct your spelling

achieve

the highest

persentage

Correct your spelling

percentage

difference of nearly 50% during the total period.

Submitted by dinaka0001 on Fri Mar 08 2024

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General

Make sure to proofread your essay to correct minor grammatical errors and typos.

Coherence & Cohesion

Each paragraph should have a clear main idea followed by supporting details. For an even stronger structure, consider using topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph.

Task Achievement

In your introduction, briefly mention the types of technology included in the graph. This helps to prepare the reader for what follows.

Task Achievement

Use a wider range of vocabulary to describe trends, such as 'saw a marked increase' instead of 'climbed up significantly'. This not only makes your essay more engaging but also demonstrates your language proficiency.

Coherence & Cohesion

Try to include an explicit conclusion that summarizes the main trends shown in the graph. This rounds off your essay nicely and makes it feel complete.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
27Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

224 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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the grap below shows in percentage terms the changing patterns of domestic access to modern technology in homes in the UK summerise the informatio by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons were relavant.

Fully explain your ideas

Art classes, such as painting and drawing, are as important to a child's development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Leaders and directors in an organisation are normally older people. Some people think a younger leader would be better. Do you agree or disagree?

In some countries university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city. Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages?

An increasing number of people are choosing to have cosmetic surgery in order to improve their appearance. Why are more people choosing to have operation to change the way they look? Do you think this a positive or negative development?

some people think pollution and damage of environment are resulted from a country developing and becoming richer, and this is hard to be avoided. To what extent do you agree or disagree.