IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below gives information about how families in one country spent their weekly income in 1968 and 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

The chart below gives information about how families in one country spent their weekly income in 1968 and 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
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The given bar graph illustrates the methods of weekly family income expenditure in a nation over the
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
 1968 and 2018.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
expences'
Change noun form
expences
show examples
over
Change preposition
on
show examples
 food , leisure and housing had reported far more than other aspects
such
Linking Words
 as fuel, clothing and footwear, household
goods
Use synonyms
, personal
goods
Use synonyms
 and transport. In detail, in 1968 substantially higher amount
had
Verb problem
was
show examples
paid for food compared to
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
in 2018, and it's the highest percentage that had been spent for one method in
whole
Change the article
the whole
show examples
 study, 35% from weekly income.
However
Linking Words
 , in both years fuel and power posted the
least
Correct word choice
lowest
show examples
 values of nearly 6% in 1968 and almost 4% in 2018.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, as same
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
in 1968 as in 2018 approximately 8 % paid off for household
goods
Use synonyms
 ,and
in addition
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 percentage was same for the personal
goods
Use synonyms
 and transport in 1968.
Otherthan
Correct your spelling
Other than
 that, the expenditure on
lesuire
Correct your spelling
leisure
 activities was shown a marked
diffrence
Correct your spelling
difference
 between
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
1968 and 2018 with almost 21% far more
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
later.
However
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 was comparatively far less than the
oppesite
Correct your spelling
opposite
 gap
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 food between the
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
 1968 and 2018,
whic
Correct your spelling
which
 was approximately 33% .

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words goods with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • compare
  • spending patterns
  • allocated
  • weekly income
  • significant changes
  • essential items
  • food
  • housing
  • clothing
  • leisure
  • communication
  • increase
  • decrease
  • twofold rise
  • substantial increase
  • quadrupling
  • declined
  • food and drink
  • slight increase
  • prioritizing
  • necessities
  • transitioned
  • portio
  • non-essential items
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