IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The charts below show the average percentages in typical meals of three types of nutrients, all of which may be unhealthy if eaten too much. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the average percentages in typical meals of three types of nutrients, all of which may be unhealthy if eaten too much. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#show #percentages #meals #three #nutrients #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The given pie charts illustrate
avarage
Correct your spelling
average
 percentages of three types of nutrients in a normal meal which are bad for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
health if consumed too much.
Overall
Linking Words
, the sodium and saturated fat
mostly
Add a missing verb
are mostly
show examples
 contained in the
dinner
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
 in
snaks
Correct your spelling
snacks
 added sugar is found to be the most.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, breakfast contains the least amount of all three
elemants
Correct your spelling
elements
. In detail,
sodiam
Correct your spelling
sodium
 content is highest in
dinner
Use synonyms
 with posted 43% value
while
Linking Words
 it is lowest in breakfast and
snaks
Correct your spelling
snacks
 with 14% equal values ,and nearly
one
Use synonyms
 third in the
dinner
Use synonyms
.
Similarly
Linking Words
, saturated fat
contend
Correct your spelling
content
show examples
 is
also
Linking Words
 highest
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
dinner
Use synonyms
 with a recorded value of slightly more than
Use synonyms
one third
Add a hyphen
one-third
show examples
compared to all the meals.
However
Linking Words
, nearly
two fifths
Add a hyphen
two-fifths
show examples
 of sugar
contains
Wrong verb form
is contained
show examples
 in the
snaks
Correct your spelling
tanks
snacks
 with slightly more than
Use synonyms
one fifth
Add a hyphen
one-fifth
show examples
 of it in the
dinner
Use synonyms
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and approximately
Use synonyms
one fifth
Add a hyphen
one-fifth
show examples
 of it in the lunch.
Likewise
Linking Words
, similar to
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 two nutrients sugar
contend
Correct your spelling
content
show examples
 is lowest in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
breakfast.
Submitted by dinaka0001 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words dinner, one with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentages" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • nutrients
  • unhealthy
  • typical meals
  • percentages
  • saturated fats
  • fibers
  • sugars
  • impact
  • average
  • consumption
  • trends
  • breakfast
  • lunch
  • dinner
  • highest
  • lowest
  • variation
  • implications
  • balanced diet
  • recommendations
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