many University students live with their families, while others live away from home because the universities are in different place what are the advantages and disadvantages of both situation ?

A faction of
students
stay with their families
during
Change preposition
while
show examples
studying at university,
while
others live
seperately
Correct your spelling
separately
due to
longer
Correct article usage
the longer
show examples
travel distance from their
home
to
university
Correct article usage
the university
show examples
.
This
essay will delve into the merits and
demertis
Correct your spelling
demerits
of both
phenomenon
Change to a plural noun
phenomena
show examples
with relevant illustrations. First and foremost, one of the obvious advantages of living with family is the
less
Correct word choice
lower
show examples
living expense compared to independent
live
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living
show examples
.
In other words
,
students
stay
Correct pronoun usage
who stay
show examples
with their families are not
require
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required
show examples
to purchase
grocery
Fix the agreement mistake
groceries
show examples
and pay rent for the accommodation,
therefore
, they can not only save money to pay tuition fees but
also
no
Add a missing verb
have no
show examples
financial worries.
For example
, it is true that many
students
in the UK are doing part-time
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
to
fullfill
Correct your spelling
fulfil
their living expenses.
However
,
learns
Replace the word
learners
show examples
may get distracted
due to
family
engagment
Correct your spelling
engagement
is the major disadvantage of living with their parents. Scholars
maybe
Correct your spelling
may be
show examples
forced to
fullfill
Correct your spelling
fulfil
family responsibilities and spend time might
be detrimentally affect
Change the verb form
detrimentally affect
show examples
their studies.
On the other hand
, university
students
living independently have more time to study without any distractions. As they have no family responsibilities, they can concentrate
for
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on
show examples
their
learining
Correct your spelling
learning
, and achieve higher
score
Fix the agreement mistake
scores
show examples
compared to the learners who
living
Change the form of the verb
live
show examples
with their families.
Nevertheless
,
home sickness
Correct your spelling
homesickness
show examples
is the most common disadvantage of scholars who
living
Change the form of the verb
live
show examples
independently. Since they are living away from their family they might not be
any one
Correct your spelling
anyone
show examples
for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
support when they are
in
Change preposition
under
show examples
mental stress.
For example
,
seveal
Correct your spelling
several
studies indicated that
home sickness
Correct your spelling
homesickness
show examples
is the most significant reason for low grades of academically
intellegent
Correct your spelling
intelligent
students
. In conclusion, less living expense is the most significant
advantages
Fix the agreement mistake
advantage
show examples
of living with family, but distraction
due to
family responsibilities should not be overlooked.
While
living independently may provide more time to study,
home sickness
Correct your spelling
homesickness
show examples
is the demerit.
Submitted by ck.manshad on

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Task Achievement
Be sure to address all parts of the prompt fully. Your essay touched upon the advantages and disadvantages of both living situations, but could benefit from deeper and more varied examples and explanations that clearly connect back to the prompt.
Coherence & Cohesion
Work on structuring your essay more logically. While each paragraph should ideally focus on one main idea, ensure the flow between sentences and paragraphs is smooth. Transitional words/phrases can help achieve this.
Coherence & Cohesion
Using a mix of complex and simple sentences can enhance readability and demonstrates linguistic range. Work on varying sentence structure to improve fluency and coherence.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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