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Writing Samples /
Band 5

The bar chart below shows estimated world illiteracy rates by region and by gender for the last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows estimated world illiteracy rates by region and by gender for the last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#bar #world #illiteracy #rates #region #gender #year #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The given chart provides information about estimated world
illiteracy
 rates by country and by gender for the
last
 year.
Overall
, from the bar chart, throughout the
regions
Add a comma
regions,
show examples
 female
illiteracy
rate
 was leading and even increasing, but
male
Add an article
the male
show examples
rate
 did not overcome the female
rate
 even increased.
Firstly
, In the
last
 year, In all regions,
female
Add an article
the female
show examples
illiteracy
rate
 was leading in South Asia with 55% of all
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
do
Verb problem
apply
show examples
not
know
Wrong verb form
knowing
show examples
 words and alphabets.
Firstly
, There were 3 regions which have a lot more people who do not know words, which are South Asia, Arab States and Sub-Saharan Africa.
The
Change preposition
In the
show examples
 3 leading
countries
 50% of all women are
illiteracy
, and
men
 are 30% of all
men
.
Secondly
, The 3 least country
which
Correct your spelling
with
show examples
 have
low
Correct word choice
lowest
show examples
rate
Fix the agreement mistake
rates
show examples
 of
illiteracy
 are developed
countries
, Latin
American
Replace the word
America
show examples
 and East Asia, These 3
countries
men
 and female
illiteracy
rate
Fix the agreement mistake
rates
show examples
 are below 20%. Especially
developed
Change preposition
in developed
show examples
countries
which
Correct word choice
where
show examples
 the
rate
 of
men
 and female
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 below 2%.
Submitted by buyabuya201 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "firstly, last".
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 73%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words illiteracy, rate, countries, men with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Illiteracy rates
  • Region
  • Gender disparity
  • Bar chart
  • Estimated
  • Summarise
  • Main features
  • Comparisons
  • Analyzing
  • Discrepancies
  • Significant
  • Pronounced
  • Speculation
  • Male
  • Female
  • Global perspective
  • Literacy
  • Educational attainment
  • Socio-economic factors
  • Cultural influences
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