Some people work for the same organization all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organizations. Discuss both these point of views and give your opinion.

#people #work #organization #life #organizations #point

Some people prefer working at

one

company

whole

Correct pronoun usage

their whole

show examples

life,

while

others believe

that is

Change the article

apply

show examples

better to have experience

Change preposition

apply

show examples

working in

a different organizations

Correct the article-noun agreement

different organizations

a different organization

show examples

. To have a job at

one

company

gives stability and frees from worries about the future.

On the other

hand

Add a comma

hand,

show examples

changing

working

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

places

accelerate

Correct subject-verb agreement

accelerates

show examples

salary

grows

Replace the word

growth

show examples

, and gives new

experince

Correct your spelling

experience

experiences

. In my opinion, it would be better to try and change

work place

Correct your spelling

workplace

show examples

. People who

works

Change the verb form

work

show examples

one

company

for

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

decades

claims

Correct subject-verb agreement

claim

show examples

that they have stability in income and steady career

grows

Replace the word

growth

show examples

Such

practice

usually

Add a missing verb

is usually

show examples

more common in

east

Capitalize word

East

show examples

assian

Correct your spelling

Asian

countries like South Korea or Japan, both those countries are highly capitalistic, and

thier

Correct your spelling

their

citizens praise more

consept

Correct your spelling

concept

of working in

one

organization. It is in fact beneficial for both employers and workers, because for a

company

it is cheaper to have a

proffesional

Correct your spelling

professional

employee with

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

experience,

therefore

they would try to provide

comfortable

Correct article usage

a comfortable

show examples

envirenment

Correct your spelling

environment

for employees.

In contrast

, there is a

tottaly

Correct your spelling

totally

opposite type of people, who prefer changing working

palces

Correct your spelling

places

That is

more suitable for a

west

Replace the word

Western

show examples

style of living, and especially for

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

new generations Y and Z. They prefer

swithching

Correct your spelling

switching

organizations

hence

, it is faster to have an increase in salary, the

resasoon

Correct your spelling

reason

reasons

for

this

Correct article usage

the

show examples

fact that getting

promotion

Add an article

a promotion

show examples

is harder than being hired for a new position.

Usually

Add a comma

Usually,

show examples

companies

rise

Correct your spelling

raise

show examples

salary

Fix the agreement mistake

salaries

show examples

for

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

vacant

position

Fix the agreement mistake

positions

show examples

to attract new

employee

Fix the agreement mistake

employees

show examples

. Both opinions are right, and it depends

from

Change preposition

show examples

an individual what to

chose

Wrong verb form

choose

show examples

Stable

Correct article usage

A stable

show examples

job at

one

organization gives safety and comfort,

while

changing positions provides rapid

grows

Replace the word

growth

show examples

. In my opinion, it is

greate

Correct your spelling

great

to have different work experiences.

Submitted by dyussenovaanel on Thu Mar 14 2024

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coherence cohesion

Work on structuring your introduction and conclusion more clearly. Ensure your introduction outlines the discussion topics, and your conclusion summarizes your viewpoint and the discussed points succinctly.

coherence cohesion

Strengthen your main points with more specific examples and data where possible. This will make your arguments more persuasive and comprehensive.

task achievement

Make sure to address the task prompt fully. Explicitly discuss the benefits and drawbacks of both viewpoints before giving your opinion. Ensure your opinion is well supported by the preceding arguments.

task achievement

Improve the clarity of your ideas by organizing them into well-defined paragraphs. Each paragraph should focus on a single main idea or argument, supported by examples or explanations.

coherence cohesion

Watch out for spelling and grammatical errors, as these can hinder the clarity of your message. Consider revising sentences that feel awkward or unclear.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
42Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

272 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people work for the same organization all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organizations. Discuss both these point of views and give your opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Research has show that the transpotation of products are the main source of pollution. Some people believe that the governmant should be in charge of this, while others believe that it is the fault of individuals. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

All cars that burn fossil fuels should be banned and eletric cars should replace them. Do you agree or disagree?

In many countries, people now wear western-style dress such as suits and jeans rather than traditional clothing. Why is this? Is this a positive or negative development?

Nowadays, most countries improve the standard of living through economic development, but some social values are lost as a result. Do you think the advantages of the phenomenon outweigh the disadvantages

Some people feel that manufacturers and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of goods. Others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging.