You have recently returned from an afternoon at your public library, and noticed various negative aspects that could be improved upon. Write a letter to the manager of the public library. In your letter: Describe the poor experience you had Include ideas for what the library should change Explain why you feel the library needs alteration Write at least 150 words. You do NOT need to write any addresses. Begin your letter as follows: To Whom This May Concern,
I'm writing
this
letter regarding several negative things in the public library
that I suspected. Firstly
, I noticed that the lighting at night in the library
is inadequate making it difficult to do any activity in the library
. I have not come here in the evening for the past 3 weeks until now, I figured this
just happen
recently. Please keep your attention Wrong verb form
happened
to
the building maintenance Change preposition
on
especially
to the lighting, I recommend you Add the comma(s)
, especially
to
change the lights to Fix the infinitive
apply
the
LED Correct article usage
apply
one
since it is durable and environmentally friendly as well!
Correct pronoun usage
ones
Secondly
, it will be great if you tighten the regulations to keep down the noise. I was reading in the quite
Correct your spelling
quiet
romm
and a lot of Correct your spelling
room
people
in the library
do
not care about their voice, I politely alerted them and they still did the same thing, it is highly distracting and not conducive to studying or reading. Wrong verb form
did
Lately
Add a comma
Lately,
this
problem becomes
more concerning, I personally feel like you need tough security to address Wrong verb form
has become
this
concern to the person right away.
In order to keep people
coming to this
library
, you should do
some Verb problem
make
improvement
in the regulations and Fix the agreement mistake
improvements
also
in maintenance. I'm afraid if everything has no advancement, people
will stop coming to the library
. Especially
Rephrase
In particular
techonolgy
is growing rapidly, Correct your spelling
technology
people
could
just find resources Wrong verb form
can
from
the Change preposition
on
internet
and they do not need Capitalize word
Internet
library
anymore. And Correct article usage
a library
library
will have no appeal for Add an article
the library
people
to come.
I hope you understand my concerns and take what I write into consideration. Thank you for your attention!
Sincerely,Submitted by evelynsuwandi2 on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph contains a single, clear idea for improved readability and coherence. While your letter generally follows this principle, refining and focusing each paragraph's main point could further strengthen your argument.
task achievement
Though your response overall addresses the task well, providing specific examples or personal experiences to support your suggestions could enhance the task achievement score. For instance, mentioning a specific incident due to poor lighting or disruptive noise can make your argument more convincing.
task achievement
Maintaining a formal tone throughout the letter is crucial in writing to a manager. Your letter mostly achieves this, but be mindful of using contractions and informal language, as they are less suitable for formal letters. Opt for 'do not' instead of 'don't', 'it is' instead of 'it's', etc.
The Greeting
Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.
Always start an informal letter in the ways:
- Dear + name
- Hi / Hello + name
‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.
For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:
- Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
- Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.