In schools and universities, girls tend to choose arts while boys like science. What are the reasons for this trend and do you think this tendency should be changed?
It is noticed that females prefer to study
subjects
like arts and males give weightage to science
subjects
. There are several factors behind this
mentality one is that girls
need to take care of other things as well like house chores, and an elegant physique, and boys have to earn good to earn money and fulfill
the requirements of their families. Change the spelling
fulfil
However
, according to
my opinion, this
trend should be altered I will discuss all these points in this
essay below.
To begin
with, there are a few factors out of which two are the most common ones that is
,
girls
need to look after their families and house management and the other is their weak bodies that are not capable of lifting heavy weights. In most Asian countries girls
choose subjects
that are easy to carry along with
their household work. Because science
subjects
are tough as compared to arts, they are less time-consuming so girls
prefer to study these subjects
more. Secondly
, they are not so strong and their body structure does not allow them to lift heavy weights because those who choose science
subjects
must have to do lifting in the form of machinery and how to start and use it. Therefore
young women choose subjects
that are easily relateable and they try their level best to bring prosperity to their homes and children's lives.
On the flip side, I think this
situation is no longer taken under consideration because nowadays there is no discrimination based on subjects
. Moreover
, girls
can do everything on their own these days they don't rely on agents for their work. Times have changed now in every sector whether pilots, doctors, or teachers all belong to the same background in studies. So, it must be altered according to
new times where both genders have equal importance and try to make their situation better and to combat with society.
In conclusion, it was considered a fact in the past days that science
subjects
are only meant to be for males but it is not so, now the trend has changed around 90% of women want to become a doctor and this
happens when they study science
subject.Submitted by aimenmalik2021 on
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coherence cohesion
The essay lacks a clear and logical structure, making it difficult for the reader to follow the argument. Consider using clearer introductory sentences that outline the points you will discuss, followed by paragraphs that focus on individual points with supporting details.
coherence cohesion
Though there is an attempt to address both aspects of the prompt, the response often diverges into loosely related ideas without fully explaining or supporting them. It’s crucial to stay on topic and strengthen the discussion with clear, well-developed examples that directly relate to the prompt.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present but they could be stronger. Make sure your introduction clearly states your main points and your conclusion summarizes them effectively. This creates a more impactful and cohesive essay.
task achievement
You have made an effort to respond to the task, but the ideas need to be more clearly developed and comprehensive to fully meet the task requirements. It’s helpful to spend more time planning your essay to ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that you elaborate on this idea with examples or explanations.
task achievement
Incorporate more specific and relevant examples to strengthen your argument. Examples help to illustrate your points and provide evidence for your assertions. Make sure to choose examples that directly support the topic and your arguments.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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