IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

You would like to buy some electrical goods at a shop in a nearby town. Write a letter to the shop and ask if they have the things you want or whether they will be able to order them. Ask what the prices are and how long they will be able to hold the goods for you.

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Dear Sir , I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to ask you about a few electronic items if they are available at your store. I moved to my new house which is located at Hespeler Village and 400 meters away from your prestige store. I specifically want
Correct article usage
the whirlpool
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whirlpool
Capitalize word
Whirlpool
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 brand because it is reliable and trustworthy and I want to order two items one is
microwave
Correct article usage
a microwave
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 and the second one is
food
Add an article
a food
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 processor , these things will save
my
Correct pronoun usage
me
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 energy and time . It would be great if I will get them within four weeks or if these items are out of stock let me know if you are able to order them for me .
Moreover
Linking Words
, I want to know the price because currently my budget is too tight , if I can
any
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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get
deal
Correct article usage
a deal
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 with
discount
Add an article
a discount
the discount
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 that would be amazing.
Due to
Linking Words
 the budget
constraint
Add a comma
constraint,
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 I will not able to pick them up before a month. Let me know if you have
capacity
Change the article
the capacity
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 to hold them
at
Change preposition
for at
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 least a month and I am looking forward to hearing from you .
Correct the word
Yours
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Your
Correct your spelling
Yours
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 faithfully, Jai

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greeting and closing
Start your letter with a proper greeting, such as 'Dear [Name]' if you know the name of the person you are writing to, or 'Dear Sir/Madam' if you do not. End your letter with a more formal sign-off, such as 'Yours sincerely' if you know the name of the person, or 'Yours faithfully' if you do not, followed by your full name.
logical structure
Ensure that your letter is organized into clear paragraphs, each focusing on a specific aspect of your request. For instance, separate paragraphs for the items you are interested in, their availability, pricing inquiries, and storage possibilities enhance the readability and structure of your letter.
complete response
To improve task achievement, make sure you address all parts of the prompt. Specifically, clarify how long you want the goods to be held for you and specify any preference or requirement for delivery options if applicable. Adjusting the tone to be slightly more formal can also contribute to a more appropriate response to the task.
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