People are having more and more sugar drinks. What are the reasons? What are the solutions to make people drink less?

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There is no denying the fact that the majority of people like drinking sugary beverages, which is considered a serious problem.

This

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essay will discuss the reasons that led to

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phenomenon, and it will suggest some solutions to overcome

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issue.

To begin

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with, in our era, there are many causes that prompt humans, particularly young adults to indulge in drinking sweet drinks.

Firstly

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, the companies, which produce these

products

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advertise them in an attractive way that entertains them and

pays

Correct subject-verb agreement

pay

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attention to these

products

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therefore

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they turn to buy them without thinking.

In other words

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, the announcements tell them only about the benefits of these

products

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, which will encourage adolescents to purchase them.

In addition

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, the taste of sweet beverages is delicious, and when they drink them, they feel that their stomach are full, so there is no need to buy food.

For example

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, Coca-Cola and Pepsi are cheap

products

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, so youth prefer drinking them rather than buying food. In terms of proposing some solutions to

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apparent dilemma, the members of society, health researchers, and scientists should cooperate together to tackle

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issue. It is

also

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possible to say that they should hold seminars and campaigns to highlight all the dangers of drinking

sugar

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drinks.

Moreover

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, the governments should support some TV programs to increase the awareness of their populations about the importance of drinking healthy

products

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, and how they can differentiate them from harmful

products

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For instance

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, drinking natural juice without

sugar

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is healthier than drinking it with

sugar

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, and it is better to drink it after eating food, not on an empty stomach. In conclusion, there are many triggers that make individuals prefer drinking

sugar

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products

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, but it is true that some solutions help humans minimize their drinking.

Submitted by sm710129 on Sun Mar 17 2024

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Introduction Structure

Ensure your introduction clearly sets the stage for the discussion. Begin by broadly introducing the issue before narrowing down to the specific points you will discuss. This will help provide a clearer roadmap for the reader.

Organization & Clarity

When presenting causes and solutions, make sure to clearly differentiate between them. Use separate paragraphs for each cause and each solution, and consider using subheadings or clear topic sentences to highlight these sections.

Use of Examples

To strengthen your examples, provide more detailed and specific instances. Instead of general comments, such as 'Coca-Cola and Pepsi are cheap', offer concrete statistics or findings from credible studies to back up your statements.

Sentence Variety

Work on varying your sentence structures to improve the readability of your essay. Incorporating complex sentences, as well as a mix of short and long sentences, can make your writing more engaging.

Conclusion Writing

In your conclusion, aim to succinctly summarize the main points of the essay without introducing new information. It's also beneficial to restate the significance of the issue and the impact of the proposed solutions.

Transitions

For coherence and cohesion, make transitions smoother between sentences and paragraphs by using a variety of transition words and phrases. This will help create a more seamless flow of ideas throughout your essay.

10
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

293 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

convenience
accessibility
aggressive marketing
health risks
obesity
diabetes
dental problems
quick energy boosts
stress relief
imposition
affordability
healthier alternatives
public health campaigns
consumer habits

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People are having more and more sugar drinks. What are the reasons? What are the solutions to make people drink less?

In some countries, people encourage their children to get a job or to travel after their secondary education and before their university education. What are the advantages or disadvantages of doing so?

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Some children spend a long time each day on their smartphones. Why is this? Is this a positive or negative development?

Some countries pay high salaries to its employees. It is argued that countries must not do it and impose limits on salaries. Do you agree or disagree ?