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Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

Car ownership has increased so rapidly over the past thirty years that many cities in the world are now "one big traffic jam" How true do you think this statement is? What measures can governments take to discourage p

#car #ownership #thirty #years #cities #world #traffic #jam #measures #governments #p
In
modern
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the modern
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 era ,
usage
Correct article usage
the usage
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 of
car
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cars
show examples
 has skyrocketed.
People
 having
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a car
show examples
car
Fix the agreement mistake
cars
show examples
 has increased drastically in the span of thirty years and it
lead
Wrong verb form
has led
show examples
 to
a
Correct article usage
the
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 problem of big
traffic
 jams in numerous
metero
Correct your spelling
metro
meters
 cities all over the world. If questioned, I think it is true to a large extent. My position is
further
 elaborated in the upcoming paragraphs with valid examples and
explainations
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explanations
as well as
 some precautions that the authorities can take to
dismotivate
Correct your spelling
demotivate
 individuals from driving their own
cars
. Discussing the
truthness
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truth
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 of the statement, the first
arguement
Correct your spelling
argument
 regarding
this
 is that
nowdays
Correct the word
nowadays
show examples
pollution
had
Wrong verb form
has
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 increased. By having numerous
car
pollution
 like air
pollution
 and
noise
pollution
 had
rose
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risen
show examples
 as
car
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the car
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 uses fuel which
lead
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leads
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 to
pollute
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polluting
show examples
 the air and the loud
noise
 from the hones lead to
noise
pollution
.
Besides
this
 , there is
also
rise
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a rise
show examples
 in accidents.
For instance
, the increase
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
cars
lead
Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
show examples
 to major
traffic
 jams in cities or outside of it and many accidents are caused
due to
 it .
Hence
 , these arguments
states
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state
show examples
 that there is an increase in
number
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a number
the number
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 of
cars
.
However
, the government can take some actions against
people
 to make
they
Correct word choice
sure they
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 don't use
cars
 more often .
To begin
 with , they should strictly implement some rules and regulations regarding
cars
 .
Such
 as if anyone is found to be breaking the
traffic
 rules
as well as
 using
cars
 so much ,
then
 a heavy penalty should be fine .
Further
, the authorities should raise awareness of using public transport by making public
transports
Fix the agreement mistake
transport
show examples
such
 as buses and trains more frequent and
rise
Verb problem
increasing
show examples
 their numbers. In
this
 way , the government can discourage folks from using their
cars
 .
To sum up
 , it is true that the number of
cars
have
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has
show examples
rose
Change the verb form
risen
show examples
 significantly in the
last
 thirty years and
this
cause
Wrong verb form
has caused
show examples
 major
traffic
 jams in many towns all over the world. It is clearly seen by the increase in air and
noise
pollution
as well as
rise
Correct article usage
the rise
show examples
 in more frequent accidents that many
people
 have
cars
 .
Hence
 , the government should implement strict rules
such
 as
penalty
Add an article
the penalty
a penalty
show examples
 for too much use of
cars
 and raise awareness of using public
transports
Fix the agreement mistake
transport
show examples
 will make
people
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
use their
car
Fix the agreement mistake
cars
show examples
 less.
Submitted by akshayashvi07 on

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Task Achievement
Ensure that your essay clearly addresses the prompt, providing a balanced perspective with relevant, specific examples. Your response should fully explore the implications of increased car ownership and propose a range of measures to address this issue.
Coherence and Cohesion
Organize your ideas logically, ensuring a clear progression from introduction to conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a single main idea, supported by specific examples or explanations.
Language
Work on varying your sentence structures and using a range of vocabulary to enhance clarity and engagement. Be mindful of grammatical accuracy and punctuation.

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